Quotes About Stand-up

A lot of my stand-up point of view is family - not Disney but dealing with teenagers.

I'm happy doing stand-up, but I'll probably do a television show eventually. If not, I'll delve into this Internet world and decide best how to harness it. What I like best about it is the independent movie style and the ability to just be completely reckless within that world. I like that a lot. I just have to acquaint myself with technology.

To this day, if you gave me $1,000, I really can't stand up - You can tell a joke. You're a good storyteller and a good joke teller.

Kevin Hart. He's the man! I like his style. He's short, so I can relate. All the stories he tells are real. I respect that, and he's just a really funny dude - great comedy instincts. To do stand-up on a stage for an hour and tell stories and make people laugh is incredible.

I don't consider myself a comic but a performer. A comic tells bad jokes.

I don't think I'd want to be a comedian today if I saw it on the telly. I wouldn't think it was a thing for weirdoes and drop-outs; I'd think it was a thing for squares who wanted to be famous.

I might get a break again, and I might get back on telly. If I don't, I'll just keep doing stand-up and doing the best gigs I can.

I don't want a chat show or to be on telly every day, as that's not my business; my business is standing in front of people and making them laugh, and I want to see how far I can get with that.

Pretty much every comic that you see live is going to be slighter ruder, slightly darker and slightly more scary. But there are restrictions when you're on the telly. I'm not trying to rude it up for live. I just have to restrict myself on the telly.

I'd seen Richard Pryor and Joan Rivers, the stuff off the telly. I don't think I'd seen anything live before I did a gig, which is weird.

I say 'no' to drugs. Whenever someone asks me for some of my drugs I say, 'no.

I watch a happy person doing stand-up, and I go, "What the hell is this? This person's happy!" You need internal conflict. You need the guy to be out of step with society. It's a tool for comedy.

Oh you wanna be a muhfuckin funny guy? Dont make me break your Kevin Hart boy.

I will always do stand-up, even if my acting career takes off. Stand-up is my life.

I don't really write jokes. I wait for stuff to happen in life, and then I tell it on stage.

As soon as I did my first five minutes of stand-up I knew that I would rather be a failure at comedy than a success in marketing.

There are 10-20 times more male comics than female comics it's something to do with the social structure of society.

Who do I like? I am a big fan of French and Saunders - not that that they are particularly stand-up I have to say, but I think they have been great for women and they are of themselves just incredibly funny whether they are male or female.

When I first started doing stand-up back in Philadelphia, the idea of being a professional writer was completely beyond me. It didn't even occur to me that that was something you could do.

I love doing stand-up, and the more you do outside of stand-up to raise your profile, the better your stand-up becomes in terms of the quality of gigs.

I don't usually eulogise about people, but I saw Russell Brand doing stand-up before he was really high profile. I didn't really know what to expect but I laughed until my belly ached.

I'm really more prolific than most stand-ups. My act changes. I do fold in new experiences, new observations, whatever you want to call it.

That's the thing, you see, we were never good enough to write proper punchlines.

I started comedy as a hobby, really, and it still doesn't seem like a proper job.