Quotes About Stand-up

I think Janeane Garofalo is incredibly funny, and I love Dennis Miller.

I love hard punch lines, and I like anything that has a strong point of view.

Whenever you go on TV, there are so many checks and balances; it's a big business with a lot of rules. Stand-up is intimate and the freest, most lawless place I've ever been able to go.

Doing five-minute sets on 'Conan' and things like that are fun and a great way to introduce yourself, but it's such a constricting time, and you usually have to cut bits down.

I've been doing stand-up for 15 years and I've never even been invited to the Comedy Awards! How mental is that?

I don't consider myself an Iranian comedian; I consider myself a comedian who happens to be of Iranian descent.

I like the ironic pomposity of a stand-up comedian. Like all those comedians thinking they can bring down Coca-Cola. They forget to be funny.

I'd much rather see Richard Pryor or Jackie Mason in a theater than in a club.

I know a lot about Jewish comedians.

I just think of myself as a comedian, really. I mean, I talk about being Jewish a lot. It's funny because I do think of myself as Jewish ethnically, but I'm not religious at all. I have no religion.

Joan Rivers telling Lauren Bacall her dress is all wrong is like Carrot Top telling Lenny Bruce he needs to get an edge.

I'm not trying to be the next Joan Rivers.

I like insult comics. Joan Rivers, Dame Edna, people like that.

There really is no Johnny Carson anymore. There is no one place a comedian can appear and explode.

There's no such thing as a hit joke.

I do a joke in my stand-up where I say I'm a Christian, but I'm not a Christian comedian. I think that's definitely how I see my acting. I'm an actor who happens to be a Christian.

I'm not a joke guy; I'm not a stand-up comic.

It is a great rush to come up with a joke that gets a good response from the audience. It's gold!

I ain't apologizing for anything, especially if it's a joke.

I make jokes. That's what I do.

You step in with the Seth Rogens of the world, you better have some jokes.

I love my jokes.

Comedy has bits, has jokes, has stories, and it has characters.

I am a product... I'm a comedian. I'm not curing cancer. In the end, I tell jokes. I make people laugh.