Quotes About Expectations

And pictures of perfection, as you know, make me sick and wicked.

I didn't lose my virginity until I was twenty-six. Nineteen vaginally, but twenty-six what my boyfriend calls "the real way".

Chicks named Tammy have a greater chance of actually driving a Mercedes than a chick named Mercedes.

I thought "RV" stood for "Recreational Vehicle." No! It stands for "Ruins Vacations."

First of all, never buy a man a plasma TV until you're married. A lot of men once they have a plasma TV they don't need a girlfriend

If you're considered a beauty, it's hard to be accepted doing anything but standing around.

You know what GED stands for? Good Enough Diploma.

Men don't realize that if we're sleeping with them on the first date, we're probably not interested in seeing them again either.

That woman in the shampoo commercial - she's happy. She's... she's too happy.

98% of all comedians feel obliged to be funny when interviewed. Less than 2% succeed.

Because sometimes in life, Ken didn't always choose Barbie. (Jane Alcott)

Oh, well, that's not bad, I suppose. I mean, I'd prefer devastatingly sophisticated - but almost endearing is more than I could have hoped for under the circumstances.

Everyone helping out was supposed to make me feel better, but it actually made me feel more like a screw up.

Dating--the socially accepted alternative to the rack.

I once bought my kids a set of batteries for Christmas with a a note on it saying, toys not included.

She wants to be flowers, but you make her owls. You must not complain, then, if she goes hunting.

Mrs. Charlotte Phelan's Guide to Husband-Hunting, Rule Number One: a pretty, petite girl should accentuate with makeup and good posture. A tall plain one, with a trust fund.

The imagination, backed by great expectations, can bring about almost any reality within the range of probalities.

Were it not for imagination a man would be as happy in the arms of a chambermaid as of a duchess.

The most loyal and faithful woman indulges her imagination in a hypothetical liaison whenever she dons a new street frock for the first time.

When our desires are fulfilled, we never fail to realize the wealth of imagination and the paucity of reality.

Nothing too long imagined can be perfect in a wordly way.

Well-bred English people never have imagination.

The easiest thing to be in the world is you. The most difficult thing to be is what other people want you to be. Don't let them put you in that position.