Quotes About Wisdom

If I only had a little humility, I would be perfect.

My wife, my daughters, even my grandchildren are funny. You've got to keep a sense of humor because anger destroys you.

You know very well that I no longer think. I am far too intelligent for that.

You have to know where the funny is, and if you know where the funny is, you know everything.

Money never made a fool of anybody; it only shows them up.

It's funny, but I think my stories - the good ones - they're much smarter than I am.

Self-discover is not as someone would have us think, a heavy, awesome, moral process where everyone sits around and frowns. As you progress towards enlightenment, you become funny.

How did I ever get sick? I've already had everything.

Don't write about what you don't know even if you don't know it.

Elephants are so wise and so funny and so endangered and so intelligent. I just think there is a lot to learn from them.

The chief knowledge that's man on from reading books is the knowledge that very few of them are worth reading.

I look for the meaning in what's funny, and I look for what's funny about things that are meaningful to me.

Why did Nature create man? Was it to show that she is big enough to make mistakes, or was it pure ignorance?

Buddha is pretty funny. Buddha is the coolest, though. If I had to go with one, I'd probably party with the Buddha.

The stuff that made me mad 20 years ago doesn't really make me mad any more.

The real question is how do you stay funny in your 70s and 80s? And that's a real accomplishment, you know, the longevity.

I don't know about Willie Davis. He's not as young as he used to be.

There is nothing funny about aging: It is rotten and depressing. Anyone who tells you otherwise just hasn't been paying attention.

I don't think I'm going to get so mature that I lose touch with the whatever wounded part of myself that feels the need to be funny. I'm already old enough that I realize that's not going to happen.

Man who stands on toilet, gets high on pot!

You can only be funny if you have matters of great importance on your mind.

The further one goes, the less (he realizes he) one knows.

We are too civil to books. For a few golden sentences we will turn over and actually read a volume of four or five hundred pages.

If you teach your children nothing else, teach them the Golden Rule and "righty-tighty, lefty-loosey.