Quotes About Connection

It isn't necessary to have relatives in Kansas City in order to be unhappy.

Dali Lama said, 'when you open the heart of the person with humor, you can tell him the most truth. But if you tell him truth without humor, the heart closes.'

My jokes are in my head and I have a duplicate copy of my jokes in a lot of British comics' heads, where they are safe.

If I can't find a theme, I can't make a film anyone else will feel. I can't laugh at intellectual humor. I'm just corny enough to like to have a story hit me over the heart.

Humor is an amazing way to talk people down off a ledge.

The way I see it... If you need both of your hands for whatever it is you're doing, then your brain should probably be in on it too.

It's funny - there's nothing that stops you laughing like the sight of other people laughing about something else.

I come from a very big family. Nine parents.

Arouse in the other person an eager want.

I do find that humor helps in relationships. It certainly helps in my marriage now because I'm a very, very fallible person. And if I wasn't funny I'd be kicked right out the door.

I get mail; therefore I am.

I got a business card because I wanna win some lunches. That's what my business card says: Mitch Hedberg, Potential Lunch Winner. Gimme a call, maybe we'll have lunch. If I'm lucky!

Men don't realize that if we're sleeping with them on the first date, we're probably not interested in seeing them again either.

Frank once slipped something into the pocket of a luggage handler at the airport and said: "Have a drink on me." The luggage handler later found out it was a tea bag.

Leo. Jason said, you're wierd. Yeah, you tell me that a lot. Leo grinned. But if you don't remember me, that means I can reuse all my old jokes. Come on!

Ladies, your happiness is very important to us. You have to understand that. Because when you're happy, you let us touch you.

it's dreadful when two people's senses of humor are antagonistic. I don't believe there's any bridging that gulf!

I went to San Francisco. I found someone's heart.

Dear 338171 (May I call you 338?)

The ones who constantly make us laugh are the hardest of friends to know - for comedians are the caricatures among us.

Meg and Belch only had eyes for each other. Not in the usual romantic sense.

One does not have humor. It has you.

I'd love to...but only with you.

You know where we got stuck? We were looking for faithfull, loving and perfect relationships-males who were always glad to see us." "So?" "We already have that!" "What do you mean?" "We've got dogs!