Quotes About Absurdity

He had the appeal of a very young dog of a very large breed -- a kind of amiable absurdity.

Just believe everything I tell you, and it will all be very, very simple. Ah, well, I'm not sure I believe that.

and then I decided I was a lemon for a couple of weeks.

What's up? [asked Ford.] I don't know, said Marvin, I've never been there.

Don't blame you, said Marvin and counted five hundred and ninety-seven thousand million sheep before falling asleep again a second later.

Arthur shook his head and sat down. He looked up. "I thought you must be dead …" he said simply. "So did I for a while," said Ford, "and then I decided I was a lemon for a couple of weeks. I kept myself amused all that time jumping in and out of a gin and tonic.

It seemed to me,' said Wonko the Sane, 'that any civilization that had so far lost its head as to need to include a set of detailed instructions for use in a package of toothpicks, was no longer a civilization in which I could live and stay sane.

I've had the sort of day that would make St. Francis of Assisi kick babies.

What do you get if you multiply six by nine? Six by nine. Forty two. That's it. That's all there is. I always thought something was fundamentally wrong with the universe

something almost, but not quite entirely unlike tea

They wouldn't even lift a finger to save their own grandmothers from the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal without orders signed in triplicate, sent in, sent back, queried, lost, found, subjected to public inquiry, lost again, and finally buried in soft peat for three months and recycled as firelighters.

The only moral it is possible to draw from this story is that one should never throw the Q letter into a privet bush, but unfortunately there are times when it is unavoidable.

If there's any real truth, it's that the entire multidimensional infinity of the Universe is almost certainly being run by a bunch of maniacs.

He's spending a year dead for tax reasons.

There was a terribly ghastly silence. There was a terribly ghastly noise. There was a terribly ghastly silence.

High on a rocky promontory sat an Electric Monk on a bored horse.

Ford looked at him severely. And no sneaky knocking down Mr Dent's house whilst he's away, alright? he said. The mere thought, growled Mr Prosser, hadn't even begun to speculate, he continued, settling himself back, about the merest possibility of crossing my mind.

If you've done 6 impossible things this morning, why not round it off with breakfast at Milliways, the Restaurant at the End of the Universe?

He would have felt safe if alongside the Dentrassis' underwear, the piles of Sqornshellous mattresses and the man from Betelgeuse holding up a small yellow fish and offering to put it in his ear he had been able to see just a small packet of cornflakes. But he couldn't, and he didn't feel safe.

And to this end they built themselves a stupendous super-computer which was so amazingly intelligent that even before its data banks had been connected up it had started from I think therefore I am and got as far as deducing the existence of rice pudding and income tax before anyone managed to turn it off.

Arthur lolled.

I asked him if he'd come to clean the windows and he said no he'd come to demolish the house. He didn't tell me straight away of course. Oh no. First he wiped a couple of windows and charged me a fiver. Then he told me.

All right, said Ford. How would you react if I said that I'm not from Guildford at all, but from a small planet somewhere in the vicinity of Betelgeuse? Arthur shrugged in a so-so sort of way. I don't know, he said, taking a pull of beer. Why, do you think it's the sort of thing you're likely to say? Ford gave up. It really wasn't worth bothering at the moment, what with the world being about to end.

One conservation worker we met said he sometimes wondered if the mating call of the male didn't actively repel the female, which is the sort of biological absurdity you otherwise find only in discotheques.