Quotes About Absurd

Okay, there is no possible combination of English words that would form a dumber plan than that.

For a moment, nothing. John was about to supply the "it's not working" when, with a wet, tearing KERRRAAAAACTCH sound, Molly exploded like a meat piñata at a birthday party for very strong, invisible children.

There was no head. What the— "LOOK! SHIT!" Franky's head was making a run for

With a bassy thump and a smell like burnt sulfur, Shitload farted himself far into the air.

The man-shaped arrangement of meat rose up, as if functioning as one body. It pushed itself up on two arms made of game hens and country bacon, planting two hands with sausage-link fingers on the floor. The phrase "sodomized by a bratwurst poltergeist" suddenly flew through my mind. Finally it stood fully upright, looking like the mascot for a butcher shop whose profits went entirely to support the owner's acid habit.

Both precious and absurd, this tightrope of existence we walk in both directions; strung only on a rhythm of heartbeats across a void

Military intelligence is a meaningless phrase because the two words are mutually exclusive.

I know I'm getting older. I pulled my left shoulder out putting peanut butter on a bagel. It was chunky, though. I pulled out my right shoulder putting Ben Gay on my left shoulder.

Stupid, Stupid Rat Creatures!

There was no law that said both your eyes had to be in their sockets.

Don't lick me, you asshole!" he said, trying to pull his arm free. Crabs licked George's forehead

I am writing this sitting in the waterlogged lobby of a rotting, half-finished condominium complex. I am surrounded by cavorting freshwater seals and have two pearl-handled revolvers in my lap, a bottle of vodka in my right hand, a human body in the freezer in the kitchens behind me, and a rather large displaced rockhopper penguin staring me in the face.

The Carthage traffic cop has an alligator in his bathtub!

Stop, he ordered, in a low but compelling voice. Do not take another step, or I fire! Dash it, he added vexedly, does the monstrosity understand English? How absurd this is! It understands the gesture, at least, I called, thrusting head and shoulders through the window. Lucas, for pity's sake, seize it! Don't stand there deriding its linguistic inadequacies!

The work of art is a stuffed crocodile.

The loneliness of the place had entered our very bones, and silence seemed natural, for after a bit the sound of our voices became a trifle unreal and forced; whispering would have been the fitting mode of communication, I felt, and the human voice, always rather absurd amid the roar of the elements, now carried with it something almost illegitimate. It was like talking out loud in church, or in some place where it was not lawful, perhaps not quite safe, to be overheard.

An explanation of some kind was an absolute necessity, just as some working explanation of the universe is necessary—however absurd—to the happiness of every individual who seeks to do his duty in the world and face the problems of life.

They were stupid, stupid people.

I touch your book and dream of our odyssey in the supermarket and feel absurd.

Se sentir bien est une ambition absurdement exagérée quand se sentir est déjà si rare

I like wee arguments, I've never been into jokes. I'm more into strange things and madness and things escalating and things not really making sense.

And if that's what the American people want, then that's what the policy should be, of course. But the idea that anything in the United States is too sensitive to discuss or too dangerous to discuss is really, I think, absurd.

Prosecuting me as an elected politician for expressing the opinions of my constituents is absurd.

I'll never understand why people somehow support pollution. It's completely irrational, and I don't get it. Somewhere along the line, they bought into this fiction that one has to choose between the environment and business, which is just a complete falsehood and absurd.