Quotes About Jokes

The studio moguls were certainly bigger-than-life figures, but they were also tough and unforgiving street fighters to a man, redeemed only because they were also the butt of so many Hollywood jokes.

I live in a flat with 3 women, I call it surround sound. I keep the ugly one behind the sofa as a woofer.

Once I took to Twitter and shared those jokes, they became a huge hit. My following grew, and some of the posts got thousands of retweets. With so many shares, money from sponsors followed.

Engineers working in the 'black world' of classified military projects are often referred to in military circles as 'black hats.' There are a lot of jokes about the difference between 'white hats' and their spooky counterparts.

I think sketch writing is a good spot for everyone to start because it requires you to develop characters, have a beginning, middle and end and have a bunch of jokes in a short amount of time.

I'm always playing jokes, even on the manager - some, not many. I want to try and keep my place in the squad.

Nixon started auditing late-night show hosts because they were making jokes about him. Then, every single one of their staff got tax audits.

I could never do stand-up because it's that thing of having to get up on stage. And out of every 10 jokes you tell, nine of them have to get a really good response.

With comedy, the jokes will come out, and people will see them coming. Changes in daily life or current events can change the consciousness of audiences and can make the show less funny or feel more stale.

I did try and do some spooky stand up once, and some of my stand-up had - I tried to do some horror stand-up, but it didn't really work very well.

Stand-up comedy is what I do, and it's so rewarding. If you write a joke and tell it to an audience of 15,000 people who laugh their heads off at it, it's the best feeling in the world.

I have this very abstract idea in my head. I wouldn't even want to call it stand-up, because stand-up conjures in one's mind a comedian with a microphone standing onstage under a spotlight telling jokes to an audience. The direction I'm going in is eventually, you won't know if it's a joke or not.

I still do standup.

I thought I could see how standup worked. I never thought of being an actor - or anything else, really - but I thought, 'I can see how you get on stage and tell jokes.'

I got all sorts of great Nebraska jokes.

I'm a fun person. I like cracking jokes and being completely nerdy.

George Clooney is actually a huge prankster. That's sort of his jam. I had no idea.

Reading the book now means that one can, if one wants, play Fantasy Literature--match writers off against each other and see who won over the long haul. Faulkner or Henry Green? I reckon the surprise champ was P.G. Wodehouse, as elegant and resourceful a prose stylist as anyone held up for our inspection here...he has turned out to be as enduring as anyone apart from Orwell. Jokes, you see. People do like jokes. (Hornby's thoughts after reading Enemies of Promise by Cyril Connolly)

You're talking dream date compared to my horror. I started out fine, she's a very nice person, and we're sitting and we're talking in this Ethiopian restaurant she wanted to go to. I was making jokes, like, "Hey, I didn't know they had food in Ethiopia. This'll be a quick meal. I'll order two empty plates and we can leave.

What I do know is I've got a brain filled with jokes I can't forget - like a tumor the size of a grapefruit inside of my skull. And I know that eventually even dog shit turns white and stops stinking, but I have this permanent head filled with crap I've been trained my whole life to think is funny.

Look at the harlequins! [...] All around you. Trees are harlequins, words are harlequins. So are situations and sums. Put two things together—jokes, images—and you get a triple harlequin. Come on! Play! Invent the world! Invent reality!

Funny Bones was good for quite a few laughs, although not quite in the straightforward way the

For every ten jokes - thou hast got an hundred enemies...

I'm an incorrigible punster. Do not incorrige me.