Quotes About Perception

Most of the stories I have go downhill quickly. In all honesty most of the good stories I have, no one else would think is funny.

The only food he has ever stolen has been down on a coffee table. He claims that he genuinely believed it to be a table meant for dogs.

Probably because I'm bald. Don't the bald people always play doctors and principals? Yeah, isn't that funny? And lawyers. A lot of lawyers and judges.

By the way, I'm funniest when I'm not being funny. I'm better to laugh at than with, pretty much.

I don't think my judgment is that good. I don't know what is funny.

I guess the more serious you play something, if the context is funny, then it will be funny and it doesn't really require you to be necessarily, explicitly humorous, or silly.

When I read a script, I have to see the funny, and if I can see it's funny, it helps me to be able to transmit that.

It's strange how interesting your dreams are, but when someone tries to tell you their dream you're just like "WHATEVER! Why don't you send me an e-mail so I can delete it?"

I thought I was funny as a kid.

The people voting for the Oscars are so old. I haven't seen one Academy award voter with a tampon in her purse.

If you don't think you're funny, no one else will.

There is nothing funny about aging: It is rotten and depressing. Anyone who tells you otherwise just hasn't been paying attention.

Is an egg a vegetable?

I don't know if there's anything intrinsically funny about Tae Kwon Do.

It's a funny semantic turn - when someone paints a landscape, no one says they "borrowed" it, only that they painted it.

You know you're getting old when you can pinch an inch on your forehead.

If you're cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you see okay?

One of my fears is that I'm suddenly not going to be funny, but still think I am. That's like my nightmare that I can wake up in a cold sweat from.

The movies are funny, in one way, because you think of everyone being as beautiful as the dawn, but that isn't true.

When I first started I was always known as The Girl on the Sitcom with the Funny Voice.

Children have an easier ability to tap into the surreal than adults do, in a funny kind of way.

The girl has a funny way of romanticizing things.

I know when I was a kid I ate a beetle. I ate a beetle because I thought it was licorice.

While we were working, we were writing about a tall girl and a short girl, which we thought was funny, because Alison's [McGhee] tall and I'm short.