Quotes from Tracy Morgan

If we all had a little bit of Michael Jackson in us, I think it would make the world a better place.

Comedians are the monkeys of acting. When you go to the zoo, everybody loves the monkey exhibit.

It's like going to the zoo when you come to my house. I have snakes, three sharks, moray eels, piranhas, five scorpions and a bird spider.

Most people don't know what's happening around them because they're just speeding through life. And before they know it, they're just old. So I just try to slow it down.

George Carlin is an influence on a generation. He made me want to do comedy.

What I have learned over the years is to try to stay in the moment. I want to feel it all because I've realized nothing lasts.

What am I afraid of? The IRS. Thats it. I dont want those people knockin on my door, man.

Too many people focus on the thing, instead of the heavenly glory of it. I don't want to give away what to expect.

Let's focus on the funny. ... That's what I'm focused on... This is the gift God gave me. That's what I want to touch in people.

I think people would want to see Tracy Morgan host Saturday Night Live.

People bring camera phones into comedy shows and clubs and concerts, and sound bites never come out right.

A stand-up's job is to hold the mirror up to society and to look at what we're afraid of. That's why we had shows like 'All in the Family' and 'The Jeffersons.' We made fun of ourselves then.

I know who I am. When I look in the mirror, I see me.

I'm a black man in America, so I'm going to be misunderstood.

Ladies are honest. They're my motivation. They know what's funny, and the dudes just follow.

Michael's the ultimate entertainer. After Michael Jackson, it's Elvis Presley, Frank Sinatra, and Bruce Lee.

If she's not spoken for, and you come at her correctly, like a man, she'll get with you.

Anybody who's lived in the ghetto knows that you don't move during the daytime. Here's why: You don't want anyone to know you're leaving, and you don't want anyone knowing where you're going.

You gotta understand, my great-grandfather was German and Irish. My grandmother was Indian, and my grandfather was African-American, so we all got a little something in us.

What you have to understand is that my thing is not glamour. I love stretch marks and C-section scars and all of that. I'm a grown man. You don't gotta put on no makeup with me.

I'm human, I feel, I understand. That's the highest level of love, is understanding - when you can understand someone, when you can love them with their flaws and their faults. So I understand, I consider. I may speak the truth, but I'll consider your feelings, too.

Affirmative action was designed to keep women and minorities in competition with each other to distract us while white dudes inject AIDS into our chicken nuggets.

When you're in the spotlight, people want to dissect you and then put you back together the way they want you.

Listen, Bruce Lee fought out of anger. That's why they call it the 'Fists of Fury.' Michael Jackson danced with fury. I do stand up out of fury. I'm not mad at anybody. I'm not mad at any human being because I'm a human being.