Quotes from Kevin Nealon

I met Adam Sandler through 'Saturday Night Live,' and we became friends.

My heart started running away, like a pack of horses. Then it slowed down and became irregular.

I learned how to draw from being bored in school. I would doodle on the margins of my paper.

I think I definitely would have ended up in some kind of show business. I was very interested in music when I was younger. This was back when Crosby, Stills and Nash were around.

I am very romantic. In fact, I just renewed my vows... although it was with another woman.

I think people really appreciate clever commercials, as do I. I think they're very entertaining. You just have to wade through all the garbage. That's one of the reasons people watch the Super Bowl. A lot of them watch it to see the commercials and not the actual game.

I have a severe addiction to 'Angry Birds.' I always tell myself, 'One more game...' But then there's always another and another and another.

I really like to read when I'm eating - 'The New York Times' or the 'Wall Street Journal,' paper version.

I have a wandering eye and a lazy eye so they cancel each other out. It's a push.

I think having a child makes you calm down. You sit still.

All I ever wanted to do was stand-up. It kind of charges me and gives me a rush.

I play a lot of sports. I'm not real good at any of them. I'm above adequate.

Basically, I'm a people pleaser who has a knack for disappointing.

I'm probably more of a stand-up comedian than an actor.

I've done this commercial with Arnold Palmer. He doesn't play that much anymore, but it'd be fun to have him in the cart.

I always tell people if you think you are susceptible to a blood clot, go check with your doctor.

Curb Your Enthusiasm, is not so much about Hollywood. It's more about Larry's weaknesses.

Print is definitely more nutritious. When I leave a website, I'm hungry again an hour later - especially the Chinese websites.

A whole generation of people that didn't know me from 'SNL' recognize me from 'Weeds' now. People recognize me once in a while and appreciate the work. It gets a little embarrassing but it's good. If you work as an accountant, you don't have people coming up to you in the streets saying, 'Hey, great job on tax statements!'

When I first began doing TV pilots, my expectations were high. I didn't understand that world. So when 'Weeds' took off, I was so happy. Especially as I was just a guest star in the pilot. But once it got picked up, they made me a regular cast member.

To this day, I haven't felt like I've made it. I'm waiting for them to pull the rug out from under me. I kind of feel like George Plimpton; I'm just experiencing this whole business with the really talented people.

You really have to be ambitious and have that drive to really become well known and successful as a standup.

It was football I enjoyed most. When I moved to L.A. to become a stand-up comedian, I thought it might be a good comedy hook to also be the punter for USFL club The L.A. Express, so I started practicing for the tryouts. Luckily, my stand-up took off, and I didn't need to do it.

Never wear a red t-shirt to Target. I enjoy helping people, but not every two minutes.