Quotes from Drew Carey

I do get the comics online I guess but it's such a pain. I'd rather just get them in the paper and read them.

I'd buy joke books and try doing them at school; I always had jokes. That would be my go-to thing at parties: I'd be able to get through them if I just told enough jokes. Otherwise, I wouldn't end up talking to anybody.

We'll never see national shows with 45 shares again.

I've got to say that I don't see myself as some sort of political type like Alec Baldwin or Barbra Streisand. I don't want to come across like that. I'd be embarrassed if that was the way I came across.

I don't miss the economic insecurity, the living paycheck to paycheck.

As far as your personal goals are and what you actually want to do with your life, it should never have to do with the government. You should never depend on the government for your retirement, your financial security, for anything. If you do, you're screwed.

As far as your personal goals are and what you actually want to do with your life, it should never have to do with the government. You should never depend on the government for your retirement, your financial security, for anything.

I just try to get people to laugh - I'm not trying to change the world or anything.

I could still eat a cheeseburger if I wanted to. I just can't have them every day.

International soccer has been a big part of my love for the sport. I love the Men's National Team. I can say that they're my favorite sports team.

The people of Cleveland hate soccer. But it's my favourite thing and I follow the U.S. men's national team around when they play whenever I can.

I learned how to believe in myself. Learned how to set goals, you know, self help books man. I just read every single one I can get a hold of, and I still do.

I was raised by just my mom. See, my father died when I was eight years old. At least, that's what he told us in the letter.

But sports photography isn't something you just pick up overnight. You can't do it once a year for fun and expect to do a good job. And I take pride in what I do.

I'm not against ratings per se. I think more information is always good. But I certainly don't think the government has to step in and set guidelines for how shows should be rated.

Eating crappy food isn't a reward -- it's a punishment.

When I did Comic Relief, I did it to be on the show; it's a badge of honor as a comedian to do that show.

Liquor prohibition led to the rise of organized crime in America, and drug prohibition has led to the rise of the gang problems we have now.

I looked at game show hosting as the bottom of the totem pole, one step away from infomercials. I never watched them myself. However, it's been a lot of fun.

If I wasn't a comic or TV star, I really wanted to be a photojournalist.

If I wasn't a comic or TV star, I really wanted to be a photojournalist. That was my other dream job.

I'm competitive at everything.

Everybody in Hollywood loves symbolic gestures.

If you're wearing a Bluetooth thing and you've got that thing on your belt, you are working for somebody else. You are not the guy in charge. That's a really good social status indicator.