Quotes from Melody Beattie

There is little in our lives we need to do that we cannot do better if we are peaceful.

We will face and deal with reality—on our own time schedule, when we are ready, and in our Higher Power's timing. We do not have to accept chastisement from anyone, including ourselves, for this schedule. We will know what we need to know, when it's time to know it.

We can tell the truth. Lying about what we think, how we feel, and what we want isn't being polite—it's lying. We

Some codependents become financially dependent

We can discuss our feelings and problems without expecting people to rescue us too. We can settle for being listened to. That's probably all we ever wanted anyway.

wrote codependency is "an emotional, psychological, and behavioral condition that develops as a result of an individual's prolonged exposure to, and practice of, a set of oppressive rules—rules which prevent the open expression of feeling as well as the direct discussion of personal and interpersonal problems."2

As we develop our lives, set our goals, and find things to do that interest us, peace will become comfortable—more comfortable than chaos.

Our consciousness, as individuals and as a society, has been raised. We've realized that women have souls, and men have feelings.

Prayer and meditation help us affirm that our Higher Power cares for

The important concept here is, get started. Light a fire under yourself.

Love and closeness often bring a sense of loss of control.

Feeling good about ourselves is a choice. So is feeling guilty.

Prayer and meditation help us affirm that our Higher Power cares for us.

It is almost impossible to have fun when we are bottled up with repressed emotions, worried sick about someone, saturated with guilt and despair, rigidly controlling ourselves or someone else, or worried about what other people are thinking about us. However, most people aren't thinking about us; they're worried about themselves and what we think of them.

Fun is a normal part of being alive. Fun is taking time to celebrate being alive.

react is important here. However you approach codependency, however you define it, and from whatever frame of reference you choose to diagnose and treat it, codependency is primarily a reactionary process. Codependents are reactionaries. They overreact. They under-react. But rarely do they act. They react to the problems, pains

The only limitations on you are the ones you've placed on yourself.

Talk to the universe. Ask it for help. Then listen to your heart. Because that quiet voice, the one in your heart, is how the universe talks to you.

Change your perspective and enjoy the adventure. Let the child in you come out to play.

Today, I will trust that God will do for me what I cannot do for myself. I will do my part—working the Twelve Steps and letting God do the rest.

According to Earnie Larsen and others, the two deepest desires most people have are: to love and be loved, and to believe they are worthwhile and know someone else believes that also.1

I saw people who had gotten so absorbed in other people's problems they didn't have time to identify or solve their own. These were people who had cared so deeply, and often destructively, about other people that they had forgotten how to care about themselves. The codependents felt responsible for so much because the people around them felt responsible for so little; they were just taking up the slack.

We are like singers in a large chorus. If the guy next to us gets off key, must we? Wouldn't it help him, and us, more to strive to stay on key? We can learn to hold our part.

the non-drinking person in a relationship with an alcoholic got just as out of control, was in just as much pain, and needed just as much healing as the alcoholic. Al-Anon