Quotes from Richard Kadrey

We nod and grunt grudging affirmatives.

The first person to say 'Intelligent Design' has to wear the Charles Darwin beard I keep in my desk for the rest of the year.

The Magistrate has been watching this whole thing with the quiet amusement of Mike Brady watching his squabbling TV kids. Only this Mike's kids are killers and Dad's got a messiah complex.

I'm okay." "You're an idiot is what you are." "That too probably.

What's up with your face? I mean you're an ugly bloke, but today you're top-drawer hideous.

It means the faction found us." He looks around again. "How?" "How the fuck do I know? Spy satellites? Facial recognition pigeons on the freeway signs? Ballerinas with Uzis? What does it matter? Just hit the fucking accelerator.

Then don't tell me who to kill and when. It unsettles my tranquil disposition.

You killed Buzzy." "Yeah. I'm sorry." "Don't be sorry. I'm glad you did it.

Hi, Keitu. Look how you've grown," I say, which is stupid because it's the last thing kids want to hear.

At least your absence wasn't eleven years like your last trip. How was your time in Le Merdier?" "Dusty. There was a judge down there. He spoke more languages and was crazier than you. If I live, I'll tell you all about it.

Oh God. It's like you're smoking a pig's ass, and the pig isn't well.

For a second, nothing happens and I'm sure that I've reached a new level of fucked. Then the hardpack around the rib shatters and I haul it out of the ground like a deranged Fred Flintstone.

I pick up a long, charcoal-gray silk overcoat at a West Hollywood rent-boy boutique. Anything heavier than silk will look ridiculous in L.A., and wearing a black overcoat is nature's way of telling you to lay off the Bauhaus.

L.A. is a lot to take in when it's not on fire.

Whatever happened to Michael?" "Oh, I killed him." "Thank you. What a complete dick." "He really was, wasn't he?" "The worst.

I generally hate to like bosses, but I like him.

Horned Toad's pal, the baby face in the jeep, is running at me, firing the rifle. I guess he's upset because he hasn't grasped the fact that it's really hard to hit anything when you're running and your gun is bouncing around like a rubber duck in a typhoon.

I came back and the place was broken into. I think by a guy named Parker. He's another magician. Some magic things were missing." "What kind of things?" "A guy. Part of a guy, really.

The way he's shooting, he couldn't hit the sky from a weather balloon.

The Magistrate hasn't said a word this whole time. He just stands there like a mantis, all insect patience and killer instincts.

When you're born in a burning house, you think the whole world is on fire. But it's not.

don't tell me who to kill and when. It unsettles my tranquil disposition.

I suppose I'll get over Janet, but it's going to be a long, sad process finding a new donut place.

He coughs wetly and wipes his mouth with a monogrammed hankie. When he's done I say, "What kind of event?" "Stupendous," says Sandoval. "Cataclysmic.