Quotes About Author

Here's what I tell people now when they come to my shows: "First of all, thank you for stimulating the economy, or at least my economic package."

Sometimes people get mad at The Simpsons' subversive story telling, but there's another message in there, which is a celebration of making wild, funny stories.

The new moron in town is Chad Ford of ESPN.com.

I don't think just funny is enough on Broadway.

Liberals have a quaint and touching faith that truth is on their side and an even quainter faith that journalists are on the side of truth.

Steve Kerr, now coaching Golden State after eight tumultuous and very inconsistent years at TNT.

No dog is as well bred or as well mannered or as distinguished and handsome.

I think my funny books are my favorites because I like to laugh so much.

Wasn't Winston Churchill the first black president of America? There's a statue of him near me... that's black.

We have that Indian scene. We can get the Indians from the reservoir.

I would feel infinitely more comfortable in your presence if you would agree to treat gravity as a law, rather than one of a number of suggested options.

And, you know, I liked writing humor. Well, I should say, I wanted to write seriously, but it kept turning funny.

Wickedly funny to read and morally bracing as only good satire can be.

English clubs are very exclusive. I played Royal Foxshire and they made me wear a suit and tie. . . in the shower.

I write by ear. I tried writing with the typewriter, but I found it too unwieldy

In the office, Michael sat behind our father's desk, clicking away at the computer with his right hand, and making notes with his left. Ambidextrous freak.

You couldn't be romantic if your life depended on it." "You know what's lucky? Most bad guys don't ask you to be romantic on command, so that probably won't matter.

I'm not the one going for a biology degree. I'm just a philosophy major who eats people.

She ignores me, so I cup my hands over my mouth and do something I haven't done in years— barnyard sounds.

The thing about For Better or Worse is the only thing that made me an okay director for that is that I have a sense of humor, and it was supposed to be funny.

But if you read Jane Austen, you know that she had a wicked sense of humor. Not only was she funny, but her early writing was very dark and had a gothic tone to it.

One of my biggest pet peeves is that I just don't like it when characters do things that are funny to the writer, but you don't know why they're doing it and it doesn't make any sense.

What readers ask nowadays in a book is that it should improve, instruct, and elevate. This book wouldn't elevate a cow.

The accents are really really funny. I think I could convince somebody I was from New Zealand.