Quotes About Humor

Demon pox,' said Will with the satisfaction of the truly vindicated.

There she is." Alec spotted his sister and waved her over, looking relieved. "Over here. And watch out for the phouka." "Watch out for the phouka?" Jace repeated, glancing toward a thin brown-skinned man in a green paisley vest who eyed Isabelle thoughtfully as she walked by. "He pinched me when I passed him earlier," Alec said stiffly. "In a highly personal area." "I hate to break it to you, but if he's interested in your highly personal areas, he probably isn't interested in your sister's.

Hey, Clary. You take care of yourself," he said. "I know you can." He paused. "And take care of Jace, that poor, helpless blond." Jace made an obscene gesture, which actually did feel familiar to Simon, so he knew that was their thing.

very funny my sarcastic friend

This is my mother's wedding,"«" she said. "We're not going to have sex. At all." "But 'at all' is my favorite way to have sex.

Picture this," said Magnus. "Me with a little monkey friend. I could teach him tricks. I could dress him in a cunning jacket. He could look just like me! But more monkey-shaped.

Gibberish?" Jem suggested "Pornographic?" said Will at the same time. "Could be both," said Will. "Haven't you ever heard of pornographic gibberish before?

Right, because I'm flat-chested and a midget.

You could dress it up with a sequined headband," Magnus suggested, offering his boyfriend something blue and sparkly. "Just a thought." "Resist the urge, Alec." Simon was sitting on the edge of a low wall with Maia beside him, though she appeared to be deep in conversation with Aline. "You'll look like Olivia Newton-John in Xanadu." "There are worse things," Magnus observed.

It doesnt hurt." "But my eyes do," said a coolly amused voice from the doorway. Jace. He had come in so quietly that even Simon hadn't heard him, he grinned as Isabelle pulled Simon's shirt down. "Molesting the vampire while he's too weak to fight back, Iz?" he asked. "I'm pretty sure that violates at least one of the Accords.

Jem] 'It will help you sleep.' 'All I've been doing is sleeping!' [Tessa] 'And very amusing it is to watch, said Jem. 'Did you know you twitch your nose when you sleep, like a rabbit?' 'I do not,' she said, with a whispered laugh. 'You do,' he said. 'Fortunately, I like rabbits.

I need some beef and broccoli before I face any more Mr. Darcy. It's a truth universally acknowledged that if you watch too much television on am empty stomach, your head falls off." "If your head fall off, " Tessa said, "the hairdressing industry would go into an economic meltdown

I forgot," Isabelle muttered as the rest of them caught up to her. "Faeries have no sense of humor." "Oh, I wouldn't say that," said Jace. "There's a pixie nightclub downtown called Hot Wings. Not," he added, "that I have ever been there.

Wallowing was for elephants, depressing people and depressing elephants

You know the stories of my grandfather, I am sure?" Jesse asked. Lucie raised an eyebrow. "The one who turned into a great worm because of demon pox, and was slain by my father and uncles?" "I feared your parents would not have considered it the kind of tale suitable for a young lady's ears," said Jesse. "I see that was an idle concern." "They tell it every Christmas," said Lucie smugly.

Matthew held out his hands. "Pax," he said, wheedlingly. "Let it be peace between us. You can pour the rest of the port on my head." James' mouth curved up into a smile. It was impossible to stay angry with Matthew. It was almost impossible to get angry at Matthew.

Look on the bright side," said Simon. "If they need a human sacrifice, you can always offer me. I'm not sure the rest of you qualify anyway." Jace brightened. "It's always nice when someone volunteers to be the first up against the wall.

Oooh, that was fun." "That does it," said Jace. "I'm going to get you a dictionary for Christmas this year." "Why?" Isabelle said. "So you can look up 'fun.' I'm not sure you know what it means." Isabelle pulled the long heavy mass of her wet hair forward and wrung it out as if it were wet washing. "You're raining on my parade." "It's a pretty wet parade already, if you hadn't noticed." Jace glanced around.

He picks up his dates in a van? No wonder he's such a hit with the ladies." -Jace about Simon, pg. 331-

You're sarcastic twelve hours a day, but you're almost never spiteful. You have a good heart under all the glitter.

Jules: Why are you on the floor? Emma: I've heard roling out of bed in the morning helps you build up resistance to surprise attacks. Jules: Oh yeah? What does screaming "holy crap!" do? Emma: That part's optional.

You snuck up on me," she said. "I guess I'm not much of a Shadowhunter, huh?" Simon shrugged. "Well, in your defense, I do move with a silent, pantherlike grace.

I think I like 'mundane' better than 'bloodsucker,'" Simon muttered. "With Jace, you don't really get to choose your insulting nickname." -Simon and Clary, pg.234-

I don't like the rain forest," Ragnor said sadly. "That's because you are not open to new experiences in the same way I am!" "No, it is because it is wetter than a boar's armpit and twice as smelly here." Magnus pushed a dripping frond out of his eyes. "I admit you make an excellent point and also paint a vivid picture with your words.