Quotes About Humor

A woman is told by her doctor that she has six months to live. "Is there anything I can do?" she asks. "Yes, there is," the doctor replies. "You could marry a tax accountant." "How will that help my illness?" the woman asks. "Oh, it won't help your illness," says the doctor, "but it will make that six months seem like an eternity!

Laughter is just a slowed down scream of terror.

You can be a bit more naughty with a live show.

I'd love to do a comedy - something where a character has to use humor to navigate the absurdities of life.

Even when I was in high school and the Navy, I was the guy who could rip somebody, and they'd laugh at it.

Someone asked me what the key to being a good frontman was, and I think having a sense of humor about it is pretty near the top of that list. It's a very strange place to be in, and I don't take that role too seriously.

Me and Greg Davies once shared a whole jar of pesto, neat, during the Edinburgh festival years ago because we had no food in the flat.

It's neat seeing people that aren't necessarily part of my demographic who really get the jokes. I love it.

I got all sorts of great Nebraska jokes.

We kept a broad audience, and we didn't make fun of people who had necessarily made mistakes in their life and burned them to the ground. We made fun of a commercial or a movie or ourselves.

I think when you do comedy, you play by a different set of rules. No one really wants you to be in that good shape. Being in good shape implies a level of vanity that isn't necessarily funny.

In politics it is necessary to take nothing tragically and everything seriously.

When the grandmothers of today hear the word 'Chippendales', they don't necessary think of chairs.

I think I became a gay comedian out of necessity, because what else am I gonna do with that name? And it has worked out now, but it was a very difficult childhood. It sounds like the hokiest stage name ever.

I have what I like to call a 'chinneck.' My chin just flows rather easily into my neck.

I remember doing a comedy show with Jim Carrey once, and he was out there with his foot behind his neck and rubbing his face with it.

When people ask me if Dean Martin drank, let me put it this way. If Dracula bit Dean in the neck, he'd get a Bloody Mary.

I've got all the money I'll ever need, if I die by four o'clock.

I cannot pull off a mustache. It's like threading a needle, because most of the time, I'll look like a complete idiot.

Everybody really needs to laugh... If you don't laugh, you're not going to live long.

My friends tell me that I've calmed down, that I seem more centered. I don't know, I think my inner self was more hollow before, which made me more scattered, and more needy to get laughs.

I've never felt any sense of kinship with other comedians; they've always seemed too needy.

People always think I'm this zany character. But I think I just see the funny side of life, I don't see the negative side, and I think that's a very good energy to be around.

Is everything funny? For me, yes. There's a positive to every negative. Even my divorce? For me, yes. If you go back and look at it, why it happened or how it happened, there's something in there that'll make you laugh.