Quotes About Humor

It's more like the work of a prankster than a vengeful spirit.

ASHLEY CARNARVON WAS TRYING TO DIG a single black sock out from under Eric Van Hoffendam's bed when he proposed. Which meant, given her position, hips in the air, feet wedged against the wall to give her leverage to reach the pesky sock, that he proposed to her butt.

needed comforting after discovering my boyfriend of two years, Todd, had stuck his salami in someone else's sandwich. I referred to him now as my ex-boyfriend 'The Toad.

The atmosphere was so dull, the cactus I brought into work died. I was certain it died of boredom.

Gustavo and Roberto suspected gangrene, but Rafael never allowed himself to sink into self-pity. Instead he kept his courage and humor, even as the poison flowed through his system and the flesh of his leg rotted before his eyes. "I am Rafael Echavarren!" he would shout every morning, "and I will not die here!" There was no surrender in Rafael, no matter how he suffered, and I felt stronger every time I heard him say those words.

The most careful thing you do is hitting a mosquito on your testis.

Luna! Artemis! lovers' spats are icing on the cake! Your just showing off to us single people! -Minako

It's been a while since someone last made her laugh. Since she last laughed without deciding beforehand that laughing was the smart thing to do.

The way I see it, I'm dead, and so are you. What do dead people do for fun around here?

I'm not just a big-haired redhead country singer who dresses flamboyantly, has this wicked sense of humor and wears rhinestones.

Is mayonnaise an instrument?

Czar Alexander is my baby daddy.

We must laugh at man to avoid crying for him.

Wit seduces by signaling intelligence without nerdiness.

When I was in nursery school, the teachers asked me, y'know, 'What does your dad do for a living?' So I said 'He helps women get pregnant!' They called my mom and they were like, 'What exactly does your husband do?'

The students adore your father,' a perfumed woman said to me. 'Aren't you lucky to live with such a charming man!' 'He's even more charming at home,' Mom said. 'Isn't he, Bea? He rides a unicycle through the house -' '- even up and down the stairs,' I added. 'He juggles eggs as he makes breakfast every morning -' '- which he serves to us in bed of course,' I said. '- and pulls fragrant bouquets out of his ass,' Mom finished. 'He's just a joy.

Of course, you realize that after eight hours stuck on a plan with Hamilton, Jonah, and Pony, I will be a stark raving lunatic." "You're already a stark raving lunatic," Dan teased. "Just get your butts down here.

Nadine Gormey. Vice president, biochemical research. Hilarious.

Jane Austen has taught me to view the ridiculous and rude with amusement rather than disdain.

When I die," goes one internet meme, "I want my group project members to lower me into my grave so they can let me down one last time.

I am not a sad clown. I am not a sad clown.

A button machine makes buttons, no matter what the power used, foot, steam or electricity. They, no matter what the motivating force, death, love or God, made jokes.

If you want to take long walks, take long walks. If you want to hit things with sticks, hit things with sticks. But there's no excuse for combining the two and putting the results on TV. Golf is not so much a sport as an insult to lawns.

Kyo-kun and Tohru sitting in a tree... K-I-S...? - Shigure Sohma