Quotes About Humor

Douglas Adams

Hey, er, hand me the raprod, Plate Captain." The

Many races believe that it was created by some sort of god, though the Jatravartid people of Viltvodle VI believe that the entire Universe was in fact sneezed out of the nose of a being called the Great Green Arkleseizure.

He would insult the universe. That is, he would insult everyone in it. Individually, personally, one by one, and in alphabetical order.

Life,' he said, 'is like a grapefruit.' 'Er, how so?' 'Well, it's sort of orangey-yellow and dimpled on the outside, wet and squidgy in the middle. It's got pips inside too. Oh, and some people have half a one for breakfast.

The idea for the title first cropped up while I was lying drunk in a field in Innsbruck, Austria, in 1971. Not particularly drunk, just the sort of drunk you get when you have a couple of stiff Gössers after not having eaten for two days straight, on account of being a penniless hitchhiker. We are talking of a mild inability to stand up.

This must be Thursday, I never could get the hang of Thursdays

nothing but a gnab gib.

said Ford, "you've got three pints to get through." "Three pints?" said Arthur. "At lunchtime?" The man next to Ford grinned and nodded happily. Ford ignored him.

Most readers get as far as the Future Semiconditionally Modified Subinverted Plagal Past Subjunctive Intentional before giving up;

Se ti chiedessi dove diavolo siamo – disse Arthur con voce fioca – potrei poi pentirmene? Ford si alzò. – Siamo in salvo – disse. – Oh, bene! – disse Arthur. – Siamo in una piccola cambusa – disse Ford – in una delle astronavi della Flotta Costruzioni Stradali Vogon. – Ah! – disse Arthur. – Questo è un modo di usare l'espressione in salvo che ancora non conoscevo.

I decided to call him Ford Prefect. (This was a joke that missed American audiences entirely, of course, since they had never heard of the rather oddly named little car, and many thought it was a typing error for Perfect.) I explained in the text that the minimal research my alien character had done before arriving on this planet had led him to think that this name would be "nicely inconspicuous." He had simply mistaken the dominant life form.

Al prin­ci­pio se creó el Uni­ver­so. Esto hizo que mucha gente se ca­brea­ra y fue re­co­no­ci­do de forma ge­ne­ra­li­za­da como una pé­si­ma idea.

Look,' said Arthur, 'would it save you a lot of time if I just gave up and went mad now?

The Guide says that there is an art to flying,' said Ford, 'or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.' He smiled weakly. He pointed at the knees of his trousers and held his arms up to show the elbows. They were all torn and worn through. 'I haven't done very well so far,' he said.

stared fixedly into the sky like a rabbit trying to get run over by a car.

I said I ordered us some foie gras." "Oh," said Arthur, vaguely. "Um, I always feel a bit bad about foie gras. Bit cruel to the geese, isn't it?" "Fuck 'em," said Ford, slumping on the bed. "You can't care about every damn thing.

The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't. And

But how are you, metalman?" said Ford. "Very depressed.

Not a lot, he said, and suddenly flashed one of those grins of his which always made people think he's been overdoing things recently and should try and get some rest.

who was arguing with a spokesman for the bulldozer drivers about whether or not Arthur Dent constituted a mental health hazard, and how much they should get paid if he did)

Hey," he said, "I thought you said you didn't want to shoot us!" and ducked again. They waited. After a moment a voice replied, "It isn't easy being a cop!

But can we trust him?' he said. 'Myself, I'd trust him to the end of the Earth,' said Ford. 'Oh yes,' said Arthur, 'and how far's that?' 'About twelve minutes away,' said Ford. 'Come on, I need a drink.

The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't." ? Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy