Quotes About Self-care

When you set and observe personal limits, you are also benefiting the person in your life with BPD. In fact, when you let the BP violate your boundaries, or do not set any for him or her, you may be making the situation worse.

Stop Walking on Eggshells Workbook)

People with BPD need their friends and family members to be stable and clear—not to reject them and not to smother them. They need you to let them take care of themselves and to not do things for them that they can do for themselves. The best way to do this and help them is by working on yourself.

Detachment is neither kind nor unkind. It does not imply judgment or condemnation of the person or situation from which I am detaching. It is simply a means that allows us to separate ourselves from the adverse effects that another person's alcoholism [substitute "BPD behavior"] has upon our lives.

Memorize the three Cs and the three Gs: I didn't cause it. I can't control it. I can't cure it. get off their back. get out of the way. get on with your own life.

When I was a kid, "selfish" was an insult in my home. It was something only "bad" people indulged in. But I learned that it was only when I started taking care of myself that I was really able to care for others.

Keeping in mind what not having limits is costing you, think about what you will do when (not if!) your family member plows right through your limits. Make the consequences proportional to the limit.

Unfortunately, many adults grew up with damaged, trampled, or nonexistent boundaries. In many cases, parents routinely violated their children's boundaries and rights or forced them into inappropriate roles. Different kinds of boundary violations cause different kinds of problems for children when they become adults:

Realizing you can't control what people choose to think: You can't make everyone happy—least of all someone who is projecting their own unhappiness onto you. Stop taking responsibility for your loved one's inner world and start taking responsibility for your own.

detach with love Some family members practice detaching with love, a concept promoted by Al-Anon,

take your life back Don't delay your own happiness. Grab it right now. There are many things you can do today to take your life back. Take some time off to reflect.

Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.

Zelfkennis en zelfzorg. Knellende schoenen geven blaren, wandelen wordt hinken, hinken wordt strompelen. Wil ik opnieuw stevig in mijn schoenen staan, dan moet ik mijn voeten serieus nemen. Waarom heb ik blaren, hoe krijg ik die weg? Welk schoeisel past er bij mijn voeten? Welke schoenen wil ik voor welke gelegenheid? Koop ik schoenen voor mijn voeten of voor de ogen van de buitenwereld? Of voor de ogen van één iemand in de buitenwereld?

De notities van Louise Bourgeois tonen hoe ze haar angsten en genot probeerde te verwoorden en vorm te geven in de praktijk van haar kunst. Ik twijfel er geen ogenblik aan dat ze daarmee haar leven leefbaarder gemaakt heeft. Vermoedelijk wist Louise niet dat zij met deze constante observatie van haarzelf, haar lichaam en haar verhouding met anderen aan zelfzorg deed.

Why should I poison my body for odds that terrible?

It's not what you carry, but how you can learn to carry it. You need to heal yourself. Your child self too, Anna. Make room for her. Find a way to let her in.

We can only go to the limits of ourselves—I've learned that if nothing else. Anything more and we give too much away. Then we're not good for anyone." "She may have to sell the

The child must be given activities that encourage independence, and he must not be served by others in acts he can learn to perform himself.

I'm drinking a Diet Coke, because frankly I ate a whole box of Pop Tarts yesterday and this will take it away.

I don't eat junk foods and I don't think junk thoughts.

I need some time to myself by myself! There must be time for thought and music and peace and solitude! Also: No one can keep a creative house and work every day from nine to five. Can't be done, folks. Ain't no way.

No matter how sad you feel, plan something special that you want to do each day, even if it's only taking a bubble bath or watching a movie. Set a date to visit a friend, or order a book you want to read from the library. Always have something to look forward to.

If someone comes along and shoots an arrow into your heart, it's fruitless to stand there and yell at the person. It would be much better to turn your attention to the fact that there's an arrow in your heart...

Take care of your body with steadfast fidelity. The soul must see through these eyes alone, and if they are dim, the whole world is clouded. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe