Quotes About Satire

Politicians can do more funny things naturally than I can think of to do purposely

The more you exaggerate, the more you will look funny!

I love religious nuts. They make me remember I have them too. So, being a health nut, I scratch them religiously. Just as I do my butt.

Real comedy is not when you laugh at an idiot, it's when the idiot laughs at you.

I think that's how Chicago got started. A bunch of people in New York said, 'Gee, I'm enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it just isn't cold enough, let's go west.'

Fake news executives are nicer than real news executives, though real news executives are funnier than fake news executives. They dont know theyre being funny.

If my film makes one more person miserable, I've done my job

There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you

There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.

You look like a talent scout for a cemetery.

He was a great patriot, a humanitarian, a loyal friend - provided, of course, that he really is dead.

I'm at the age where food has taken the place of sex in my life. In fact, I've just had a mirror put over my kitchen table.

Our comedies are not to be laughed at.

I saw a notice that said Drink Canada Dry and I've just started.

The only reason I made a commercial for American Express was to pay for my American Express bill.

I'm as pure as the driven slush.

Breasts like granite and a brain like swiss cheese.

If life were fair, Dan Quayle would be making a living asking 'Do you want fries with that?'

While he was talking at Baylor University, President Bush said, Times are kind of tough. He also pointed out that Bill Gates is kind of rich, that water is kind of wet, and that Elvis is kind of dead.

She's so pure, Moses couldn't even part her knees.

Joan Collins unfortunately can't be with us tonight. She's busy attending the birth of her next husband.

In the end, everything is a gag.

I won't eat anything that has intelligent life, but I'd gladly eat a network executive or a politician.

Good taste and humour...are a contradiction in terms, like a chaste whore.