Quotes About Toilet

What's the difference between poo and poop anyway?" "Poo is what goes in the toilet; poop is what you find on your front lawn." "So is poo determined purely by its maker, or does it refer to its semiaquatic state?" "Uh . . . all I got is poo. You'll have to ask Felix about the details." "He is the poomeister." "Is he?" "Naw, I just liked the way it sounded.

During the toddler years, a lot of action takes place at the toilet. No, not potty training; throwing things in. From a toddler's viewpoint, the commode is one of the best toys around.

If a woman were about to proceed to her execution, she would demand a little time to perfect her toilet.

What exactly did we learn in kindergarten? Nothing we wouldn't have learned if we;d stayed home. Okay, we learned that sometimes, by the time you get to the bathroom, it's too late.

The Johnson Space Center "potty cam," as it is more casually known, is an astronaut training aid. It provides a vivid, arresting perspective on something you've had intimate contact with all your life but never really seen. Perhaps not unlike viewing one's home planet from space for the first time. Positioning is critical because the opening to a Space Shuttle toilet is 4 inches across, as opposed to the 18-inch maw we are accustomed to on Earth.

The same day, Putin made one of his first television appearances. "We will hunt them down," he said of the terrorists. "Wherever we find them, we will destroy them. Even if we find them in the toilet. We will rub them out in the outhouse.

It is easier to wax elegiac for the life of a peasant when you do not have to use a long-drop toilet.

So one time when I was working in this motel one of the toilets leaked and I had to replace the flapper ball. Here's what it said on the package; I kept it till I knew it by heart: 'Please Note. Parts are included for all installations, but no installation requires all of the parts.' That's kind of my philosophy about men. I don't think there's an installation out there that could use all of my parts.

Meg tried to squeeze past his long legs, but there wasn't room; she had to lower the toilet seat and lie across it in order to reach him, and part of her mind roared with slightly hysterical laughter at the absurdity of the position.

Now, the scene you just saw, I began, pointing to the stage. Was about you and T.C., he concluded, nodding like he already knew. What?? She pretends she doesn't like him and he pretends he doesn't care. I had no handy rebuttal to that particular allegation and wouldn't have been able to come up with one if I'd been given a week's notice. So I countered with the only safe reply I could think of. The toilet is not working properly.

A cat is the only domestic animal I know who toilet trains itself and does a damned impressive job of it.

I wouldn't go against Reggie and actively encourage Zoe to move in, but I think she and I would do okay together. If nothing else she could help me in my never-ending campaign. Some people want to save the rivers or save the whales, even save the entire planet - I just want to keep the toilet seat down.

And so the dentist says 'Rinse.' So you lean over, and you're lookin' at this miniature toilet bowl.

And of course, when you see your brother in the toilet bowl...there's a little voice that say, 'I wonder where he would go...'...if it hadn't been for his head...

The Weather Underground's revolution is sputtering. ... All they managed to do is blow up a bunch of government commodes. FBI agents are laughing at them, calling them "the terrible toilet bombers." There is even a mocking ditty: "Weatherman, Weatherman, what do you do? Blow up a toilet every year or two.

The term head, in reference to a toilet, comes from the special board extending from the "beak head" of the ship (the pointed bow) out over the ocean for passengers to use as a communal toilet. The wind and waves dispatch any odor or mess.

My dad always jokes that we should have a reality TV show because my friends and I pull crazy stunts, like putting Saran Wrap on the toilet.

From the outside looking in, trying to decipher Google's search algorithms is like reading tea leaves in a toilet bowl…as it's flushing. With the lights off.

France is the only country where the money falls apart and you can't tear the toilet paper.

You wondered even when you heard that he was wont at Oxford to make without help his toilet of every day. Well, the true dandy is always capable of such high independence. He is craftsman as well as artist.

He sported a wedding ring and a wristwatch that looked sturdy enough to flush down a toilet without losing time.

France is a place where the money falls apart in your hands but you can't tear the toilet paper.

There is a lot of rubbish written about toilet humour - people saying it is childish and pretending it is beneath them - but there is no doubting the effectiveness of a really good willy gag.

No innovation in the past 200 years has done more to save lives and improve health than the sanitation revolution triggered by invention of the toilet. But it did not go far enough. It only reached one-third of the world.