Quotes About Irony

He's turned his life around. He used to be depressed and miserable. Now he's miserable and depressed.

I felt like a kid at Santa Claus's funeral.

There is a fundamental irony at work. More and more of us keep pouring into the region, in no small part because it seems relatively empty compared to the rest of the country. What attracts us we then ruin.

I was walking down the street with a friend the other day and a guy with a gun jumps out of an alley and says "Stick 'em up." As I pull out my wallet, I figure, "Shouldn't be a total loss." So I pull out some money, turn to my friend and say, "Hey, Fred, here's that fifty bucks I owe you." The robber was so offended he took out a thousand dollars of his own money, forced Fred to lend it to me at gunpoint, and then took it back again.

Often, the only polite thing to do if one has accomplished something significant is to instead make fun of oneself.

It is one of the great ironies of history that modern racism—probably the single greatest evil of our last two centuries—had to be invented largely because Europeans continued to refuse to listen to the arguments of the intellectuals and jurists and did not accept that anyone they believed to be a full and equal human being could ever be justifiably enslaved.

It was the strangest thing to me that Charlie Gaines was publishing all these Bible stories about love and kindness," said Klapper, "and he was the nastiest son of a bitch on the face of the earth.

Foster golf club and cemetery - Only one stroke away from each other...

Sometimes in the most tragic situation, something just profoundly funny happens.

Humans are so Funny. So much moralising about words while at the same time thinking it perfectly "moral" to pepper-bomb cities full of people to protect them from violence.

TODAY IS GROUNDHOG DAY.2 Perhaps now it's better known for the movie 3 of the same name. Here is my ironic Groundhog day resolution… I will continue to do what I've always done, while expecting things to improve and the outcome to change!

It was the bitterest irony; I came to Washington to fight for "the family" and destroyed mine in the process.

A psychologist recently wrote that "aesthetics have replaced ethics, so that stealing is no longer immoral, but being ugly and fat is." I'm drawn to people still willing to work against this frightening irony.

I enjoy my pettiness with a dose of wit.

Literature is mostly about having sex and not much about having children. Life is the other way round.

Literature is mostly about having sex and not much about having children; life's the other way round.

Absurdity is what I like most in life, and there's humor in struggling in ignorance. If you saw a man repeatedly running into a wall until he was a bloody pulp, after a while it would make you laugh because it becomes absurd.

Absurdity is what I like most in life, and there's humor in struggling in ignorance. If you saw a man repeatedly running into a wall until he was a bloody pulp, after a while it would make you laugh because it becomes absurd.

The irony is that while God doesn't need us but still wants us, we desperately need God but don't really want Him most of the time.

God often gives nuts to toothless people.

Psychiatrists say that 1 of 4 people are mentally ill. Check 3 friends. If they are okay, you're it.

Thank God I'm an atheist.

I used up all my sick days, so I'm calling in dead.

I knew it. I knew it. Born in a hotel room - and God damn it - died in a hotel room.