Quotes About Irony

Ah Mozart! He was happily married - but his wife wasn't.

I was going to get an abortion the other day. I totally wanted an abortion. And it turns out I was just thirsty.

People Trample Over Flowers, Yet Only To Embrace A Cactus.

We were happily married for eight months. Unfortunately, we were married for four and a half years.

How could a man ever trust in a woman's judgment when he knows she chose him for a husband?

Jerry Lewis has been married twenty times. He gets married on a Tuesday, they find his wife dead in a swimming pool on Thursday. Maybe if you married someone who's old enough to swim next time, OK Jerry?

It was a perfect marriage. She didn't want to and he couldn't.

I'd marry again if I found a man who had fifteen million dollars, would sign over half to me, and guarantee that he'd be dead within a year.

Marriage is an institution and that's where a couple finish up.

It is a sad fact that 50 percent of marriages in this country end in divorce. But hey, the other half end in death. You could be one of the lucky ones!

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.

I was the best man at the wedding. If I'm the best man, why is she marrying him?

I understood the weight of promises, and Rafe's strength as a king mattered more to Morrighan now, than it ever had. It mattered to me. I stared out at the jagged line of forest, feeling the stinging irony of Rafe's choice: To help me and the kingdom of Morrighan survive, he had been forced to cut out my heart.

How did you end up with an assassin and newly crowned king as your confidantes?" "The gods have a wicked sense of humor.

A cunning liar who relies on the word of another? I suppose I should appreciate the colossal irony.

Christopher admitted his power but it was precisely the kind of power that he was most incapable of admiring. It was an irony of which he was conscious that he continued to enjoy its benefactions.

Humor is a rubber sword--it allows you to make a point without drawing blood.

Forget Murphy's Law. Nixie's Law: if you were waiting to make a left turn, there was always one oncoming fucktard who sailed through on the red. If you were in a grocery line, whichever line you picked would be run by Nimrod the Wonder-Iguana.

But why, she thought wryly, did a man seem more attractive as he became less available? How humbling to think one had so much in common with a cow stretching its neck through a gate for better grass.

Others beside Jane Austen have made their Eltons, though none quite so cooly as she.

As soon as whatever provisional well of confidence dries up, I will feel like a frightened motherless child. And I will—what? Lessee, I'll beg friends to assure me I'm fascinating, that my soul is complex so I can once more conduce to irony. An abyss opens up.

The laughter of the aphorism is sometimes triumphant, but seldom carefree.

Morpheus Throughout human history, we have been dependent on machines to survive. Fate, it seems, is not without a sense of irony.

Being stupid has its upsides.