Quotes About Self-deprecation

First of all, I can't really claim to be a great chef.

I've always wanted to be the first one to laugh at me. I didn't want to get up on stage and start doing something and have someone say, 'Are you serious? Do you think that's good?'

Time to pour a glass of strawberry Quik—Mr. Beukes liked to use it as an ingredient in his protein shakes, and I liked to use it as an ingredient in my fat ass—

All other areas of my life, I'm hopeless. I can't even be certain how to boil an egg.

Don't go see the movies, I'm a troll. I think the movie was great, but their biggest mistake was me.

Oliver Wendell Holmes once attended a meeting in which he was the shortest man present. "Dr. Holmes," quipped a friend, "I should think you'd feel rather small among us big fellows." "I do," retorted Holmes, "I feel like a dime among a lot of pennies."

I'm in shape. Round is a shape... isn't it?

I've been embarrassing myself publicly for over 20 years. Why should I stop now?

If you had a face like mine, you'd punch me right on the nose, and I'm just the fella to do it.

Saying gay people shouldn't be the punchline is basically saying don't make people the punch line, which I think is ridiculous. The whole point of comedy is, on some level, to make fun of ourselves and put everything into an absurdist context.

I would make a few jabs at myself and go for the audience - they are still as flawed as ever.

I can really laugh at myself and make a fool out of myself.

I've always made a fool out of myself.

In England, you laugh at yourselves; in France, we laugh at others.

I've got more chins than a San Francisco phonebook.

You know we are flawed people, so if someone is going to make a movie about me, they don't have to make it up. My real flaws are much funnier.

I go out with my mates and after a drink they'll ask, 'How are you a comedian? You're not the funniest among us,' And they're right - I'm not even the funniest in our house.

If I can't laugh at myself I'm really lost

I'm willing to make fun of myself.

If you look at me close enough, there's a small resemblance to a chicken nugget. I don't know if it's my skin texture or my hair, but the resemblance is definitely there.

I always say, 'Thank goodness 'Wimpy Kid' was a comedy because my singing in that was more humorous than professional.'

People come up to me and say, 'Can I just thank you for writing my life?' And I reply, 'I'm glad someone else is as idiotic as I am.'

I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox the cat kept trying to cover me up.

I'm so ugly, as a kid, I once stuck my head out the window and got arrested for mooning.