Quotes About Comedy

When I first started out in the industry, I was 12 or whatever, and I wanted to be on something so bad, and I didn't know what I was going to be on. At the time, I was in school, and I was working on drama and theatrical stuff, so I never thought that I'd end up going to comedy.

It's my job to be the Pierrot, the clown, in the theatrical sense.

When I was doing standup, I always wanted to get out of the standup world and take it back into the theatrical world, like with 'No Cure For Cancer.'

I want to be more physical and theatrical within the stand-up. There might be dance moments, and people better watch out - I will gallop.

For me, it's nice to have a character who can never find love and have that be the running theme, but I think when you open the door to a story line about relationships, you open the door to another realm of comedy.

Scene by scene, you can't help being impressed by 'Mean Girls;' it's like a group of sketches linked by a theme, with some playing much better than others.

All of my stuff is based on personal stories to back up my arguments. It's not a lecture, it's still comedy. I think a lot of comics forget that you can have a theme but that it shouldn't replace the jokes.

My stand-up shows don't really have a theme but do have an interactive element to them.

We never dealt with satire or suggestive material. Although some of our films were broad parodies or burlesques of popular dramatic themes, there was no conscious attempt at being either sarcastic or offensive.

I think comedy and satire are the strongest ways to deal with very serious themes and very painful themes.

Life is the tragedy," she said bitterly. "You know how they categorize Shakespeare's plays, right? If it ends with a wedding, it's a comedy. And if it ends with a funeral, it's a tragedy. So we're all living tragedies, because we all end the same way, and it isn't with a goddamned wedding.

You know how they categorize Shakespeare's plays, right? If it ends with a wedding, it's a comedy. And if it ends with a funeral, it's a tragedy.

I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox the cat kept trying to cover me up.

I'm at the age where I want two girls. In case I fall asleep they will have someone to talk to.

I'm so ugly, as a kid, I once stuck my head out the window and got arrested for mooning.

I don't get no respect. I told my landlord I want to live in a more expensive apartment. He raised the rent.

What a childhood! I was breast-fed by my father.

Last Christmas, I got no respect. In my stocking I got an Odor-Eater.

I had no luck with dating. My big thrill was self-inflicted hickies.

My wife met me at the door the other night in a sexy negligee. Unfortunately, she was just coming home.

I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it.

I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me.

My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.

My wife wants sex in the back of the car and she wants me to drive.