Quotes About Comedy

I was so ugly my mother used to feed me with a sling shot.

Have I got a mother-in-law. She's so neat she puts paper under the cuckoo clock.

I told my mother-in-law my house is your house. So she sold it.

I'm not saying my mother didn't like me, but she kept looking for loopholes in my birth certificate.

I took my mother-in-law to Madame Tussaud's Chamber of Horrors, and one of the attendants said: 'Keep her moving sir; we're stock-taking.'

My mother-in-law's so fat that when she passes her handbag from hand to hand she throws it.

My mother-in-law had to stop skipping for exercise. It registered seven on the Richter scale.

My mother-in-law has so many wrinkles, when she smiles she looks like a Venetian blind.

My wife said, 'Can my mother come down for the weekend?' So I said, 'Why?' And she said, 'Well, she's been up on the roof two weeks already.'

We're blessed on 'How I Met Your Mother' to feel like we're doing a bit of a funny playlet everyday.

I get no respect... I tell you, when I was born, the doctor smacked my mother

My mother was always the one with the dark, really filthy sense of humor. She was a vulgar woman. She used to tell me to do comedy before I even tried it. She was always up for any gag.

Actually, the reason I look like this is because my father was from Sweden and my mother was Elton John.

Any man that has had a mother, has a sister, wants to be a father will find this [movie Bad Moms] incredibly eye opening and hysterical and funny.

I've never hit a woman in my life. Not even my own mother.

My mother's greatest joy in life was to make people laugh.

I bought an ideal gift for my mother-in-law - a battery-operated mouth.

I'd love to slit my mother-in-law's corsets and watch her spread to death.

All I ever learned at my mother's knee was what a bony knee looked like.

My mother was very funny. My dad had a great sense of humor. My grandmother, too.

Tragedy is actually untimely comedy

Sometimes you just can't get rid of a bomb!

Yeah, romantic comedies are the hardest movies to make. Maybe one works a year.

Think about scary movies: There's a fine line between horror and humor.