Quotes About Comedy

I was lucky enough myself to have been in Dad's Army for an episode.

My uncles were all funny. My dad wasn't funny, but my uncles were all funny. Now I go back and I like him better than them, they were manipulative funny.

My dad was the funniest guy I ever knew.

Dad loved movies and I grew up with British comedy. My ultimate favourite is Peter Sellers.

I'm dating a homeless woman. It was easier talking her into staying over.

You ever been on a date so bad, the girl makes you drop her off at another dude's house?

I have such poor vision I can date anybody.

I had a date with an inflatable girl. Now I got an inflatable guy looking for me.

When I don't know what to do, I just open my mouth. Why won't anyone date me?

Journalist: 'Have you received any death threats?' Harry Redknapp: 'Only from the wife when I didn't do the washing up!'.

Good news for senior citizens: Death is near!

There's nothing funnier than getting a death threat via MySpace. Why don't you just write it in a children's birthday card.

I mean, the death in the late eighties and early nineties really shook out a lot of hacks. The pond just sort of dried up for a lot of really bad comedians.

If you try to go for a laugh, it's death to the comedy. Personally, that's how I approach comedy. But I'm no expert.

Cake and tea or death?

I wouldn't feel satisfied being on set every day doing a romantic comedy - I'd be bored to death.

When death comes too near, comedy and tragedy fall silent.

Sometimes joking is a relief from seriousness.

would be funny if Mr. Piccolo resembled a piccolo, but he doesn't. Actually, he's quite round. More like a bass fiddle. He has a big pouch of a belly that stretches the oversized turtleneck sweaters he always wears. He has a round face, too. He's mostly bald and his scalp shines like a bowling ball. He wears square eyeglasses, which are always sliding down

The weekend passed slowly. Todd and Danny went to a movie on Saturday. It was a comedy about space aliens trying to run a car wash. The aliens kept getting confused and washing themselves instead of the cars. In the end, they blew up the whole planet. Danny thought it was very funny. Todd thought it was dumb, but funny. On Sunday, Regina came home from Beth's. The whole family drove upstate to visit some cousins.

Eve: We nearly got killed over ice cream. Shane: Another thing I don't want on my tombstone. Claire: You have others? Shane: *first finger* I thought it wasn't loaded. *second finger* Hand me a match so I can check the gas tank. *third finger* Killed over ice cream.

I paused in the act of opening the door and looked at him with what were probably cartoon-wide eyes. Wait a second, I said. So, you're best friends with a hot vampire chick who likes leather. Yeah. And together, you fight crime? I couldn't help it. I cracked up.

Shane stood up when he saw her, which made her heart turn cartwheels, and he pulled out her chair. Eve and Michael shared an amused look. So cute, Eve said. When Shane glared, she smiled. No, really. It is. Dude, chill.

Life is funny, baby, and that's no joke