Quotes About Bathroom

She thanked the toilet, but it did not respond. That was good—if she started to think of it as a sentient being, it would probably be much harder to poop in its mouth.

How would it be if we discovered that aliens only stopped by earth to let their kids take a leak?

They discussed several other options, including sending it to the president to help him run the government. But they didn't think he would want money meant for a bribe, either. In the end, they snuck upstairs to the bathroom, where they ripped up the five-dollar bill and flushed the pieces down the toilet, laughing so hard they almost woke up Lydia.

Stanley flipped up the toilet lid and took a long piss, terrified that he might spring a leak and hit himself in the eye.

Here I am, in a lovely hotel room, with my own bathroom. I have never experienced such incredible luxury.

Body-waxing as a torture-slash-interrogation tactic is illegal under international law. FALSE. (But if the yells coming from Tina Walters's bathroom were any indication, it totally should be true.)

Japanese women live in fear of making the least sound in a bathroom stall. Japanese men pay no attention to the subject whatsoever.

I have to go... drop some kids in the pool.

In a house where there are small children the bathroom soon takes on the appearance of the Old Curiosity Shop.

I would like to meet you all in Heaven. But there's a litany of dreams that happens somewhere in the middle. Moonlight spilling on the bathroom floor. A page of the book where we transcend the story of our lives

Is your new toothbrush in the bathroom?" "You didn't pick one up? God, you know I hate it when you use my toothbrush." "I can put your cock in my mouth, but not your toothbrush." "I don't brush my teeth with my cock.

Oh my gods, when do you not sport wood? There are bathrooms in the back, so go burp the worm or whatever.--Regin

Yo, Dekko, who do I gotta blow around here to get a shower?

How long a minute is, depends on which side of the bathroom door you're on.

Use the Force! But use the bathroom first if you need to.

Thou may leave the toilet seat up. But thou shalt not leave the toilet seat down and pee on it.

Well, let's say you heard a fight in the boys' bathroom, and you broke it up. What would you do naturally if you could solve it your way?" "I would run in the other direction. You really expect me to go in the boys' bathroom? Let them kill each other.

I don't like a clever toilet looking at our butts.

I needed to hire someone to manage all this, but I dreaded it. It's not like you just hire one person. You hire their family and their problems, their illnesses and financial issues and weird habits and friends. You're forced to share a bathroom with them. It's like sleeping with someone without the benefits.

He just cleaned the bathroom." "So?" "I've been sending samples into the lab when I got bored. They are as of yet unidentified. It never occurred to me to clean the damned thing." Whiskey sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I know, I know, I know—you don't want to get blood all over it now that it's clean.

I mean, we bonded doing blow in the bathroom when we were doing our clinical rotations. It was 1987—who wasn't getting high? But…." He sighed, and Mackey realized his voice had gotten really impassioned.

I prefer to sing in the shower because the acoustics make you sound great, baby.

The highs of having a big family were that there was always someone to play with and you get loads of birthday presents. The lows were sharing the bathroom.

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in.