Quotes About Wit

I thought I was funny as a kid.

I will laugh about this one day, I told myself. I will laugh about it with people so clever and sophisticated I can't imagine them properly now.

Sometimes she talked like a poet; she made a little joke of it, so that you wouldn't mind.

My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on.

Is this the point where I sing the little song about Pic and London sittin' in a tree?" "Only if you want the tree shoved up your ass.

She looked at Murphy, whose crazy brown hair leapt out of her cheap wool hat like snakes in a trick can of nuts. Then she winked at Judge Abbott as if they were in on some private joke. "Murphy, you should come in for a cut before your interviews start." Murphy squinted at Lucretia with exaggerated concern. "Do they do waxing? It looks like your mustache is growing back.

She had passed the spring of youth, but her wit prolonged the triumph of its reign, and they mutually assisted the fame of each other; for those, who were charmed by her loveliness, spoke with enthusiasm of her talents; and others, who admired her playful imagination, declared, that her personal graces were unrivalled.

But you're not as stupid as they say!... Or are you?

I'm terrible at practical jokes. I do them too well, so they're not funny. I end up saying, 'Oh, no, I'm joking, I'm joking.'

I'll see if I can find someone in the Toland Police Department who doesn't use his brains to wipe his backside.

Aye subtle hen

Prithee Sirrah and Begorrah.

You are wickedly droll, Lord Downing. However do you survive with such wit at your disposal?" He smiled. "It is most troublesome.

I am dating, but it is hard to find someone quick enough and funny enough. I am quite demanding.

We challenge each other to be funnier and smarter.

I was funny in a way that was not dissing the teacher; I was funny just to be funny. A real charmer with a prominent mustache that he didn't know what to do with and a smart-alecky attitude.

I am naturally prone to fun or to be funny, but when I talk about myself in interviews, then it's an intellectual exercise.

I told my mother-in-law that my house was her house, and she said, 'Get the hell off my property.'

One nice thing about making jokes is that you don't have to prove them.

It is possible to have good manners and be funny at the same time. Ronnie Barker and I proved that.

This thy wit hath no wit.

Brother, I would thy wit were like thy spear! But Nature wills not one man should be wise In all things; each must seek his separate prize. And thine is battle pure. There comes this word

Odysseus. Say, Diomede, wilt make the men thy share, Or catch the steeds and leave the fight to me? Diomede. I take the killing, thou the stablery: It needs keen wit and a neat hand.

I can't bare you when you're not amusing.