Quotes About Reflection

Do I listen to pop music because I'm miserable or am I miserable because listen to pop music?

I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.

If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.

If only you would be altogether silent! For you, that would be wisdom.

Sunday clears away the rust of the whole week.

Weekend planning is a prime time to apply the Deathbed Priority Test: On your deathbed, will you wish you would spent more prime weekend hours grocery shopping or walking in the woods with your kids?

My act is very educational. I heard a man leaving the other night saying, 'Well that taught me a lesson'.

I see my face in the mirror and go, 'I'm a Halloween costume? That's what they think of me?

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?

My school days were the happiest days of my life; which should give you some indication of the misery I've endured over the past twenty-five years.

Education is a progressive discovery of your own ignorance.

Hearing nuns' confessions is like being stoned to death with popcorn.

I knew when my career was over. In 1965, my baseball card came out with no picture.

Ou don't realize how easy this game is until you get up in that broadcasting booth.

Study without thought is vain: thought without study is dangerous.

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they are okay, then it's you.

A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction.

A drunk mans words are a sober mans thoughts.

Maybe the most that you can expect from a relationship that goes bad is to come out of it with a few good songs.

Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.

If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you. If you really make them think, they'll hate you.

A man doesn't know what happiness is until he's married. By then it's too late.

There is life after retirement, and it is BETTER.

A woman drove me to drink and I never even had the courtesy to thank her.