Quotes About Perspective

The fellow who says he'll meet you halfway usually thinks he's standing on the dividing line.

I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining.

Currently we don't have plans on conquering the world.

To disagree with three-fourths of the British public is one of the first requisites of sanity.

I want to thank my parents for somehow raising me to have confidence that is disproportionate with my looks and abilities.

You ever talk about a movie with someone that read the book? They're always so condescending. 'Ah, the book was much better than the movie.' Oh really? What I enjoyed about the movie: no reading.

The difficulty about all this dying, is that you can't tell a fellow anything about it, so where does the fun come in?

I don't read economic forecasts. I don't read the funny papers.

It's funny, I listen to friends who talk about back when they were 14, eight, 16, whatever, as if it was yesterday. Me, I've no idea what I did. It's all a blur, I'm afraid.

Anything that is not funny at a certain point will be funny.

My brain is very simple. Like when you break everything down. I see things in a simple way. And that simplicity for some reason becomes funny to other people because they don't look at it that way.

I've never set out to write a funny movie or be a funny comedian as a woman. I am a woman. I don't really have a choice in the matter. My goal is just to be funny.

Tip the world over on its side and everything loose will land in Los Angeles.

Ladies pick funny things to be proud of.

Anyone who watches golf on television would enjoy watching the grass grow on the greens.

Only kings, presidents, editors, and people with tapeworms have the right to use the editorial 'we.'

What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.

Funny is an attitude.

Boys in their twenties are a waste of time. They have nothing to offer conversationally; they're immature. I feel like I have a better shot with someone in his thirties.

Golf is a better game played downhill.

It is funny how mortals always picture us as putting things into their minds: in reality our best work is done by keeping things out.

It's a wonderful way to live, and not a bad way to go, either. The average Frenchman is still smiling three months after he's dead.

If you can find the line between sympathetic and creepy, you have reached a very funny area.

People who can't see without glasses should wear them.