Quotes About Perspective

Pan took the joke good-naturedly, probably deciding it wasn't a good idea to argue with a fifteen-year-old who had just pulled two people up ten feet.

It's funny when people say something is "unreal" about something that is, in reality, real. I'm so guilty of it, it's real!

Oh, well, that's not bad, I suppose. I mean, I'd prefer devastatingly sophisticated - but almost endearing is more than I could have hoped for under the circumstances.

It was deflating to realize how much my own family's quality of life might improve if I replaced myself with a Fundamentalist stay-at-home daughter.

You can make heaven out of hell, or hell out of heaven. The choice is yours.

A delightfully droll look at how the other half lives from a pet pooch's point of view.

My cat mocks me frequently. It's the universe's way of keeping me from getting too big of an ego.

There are many good things about getting older, but no one knows what they are.

Growing up is the dumbest thing I ever wanted to rush into.

I'm quite certain that if I lost my sense of humor, it would most definitely need to be replaced by a padded cell.

Sometimes... the first step to forgiveness is realizing that the other person... is batshit crazy.

Writing a story is like ruling the world. Except it's even better. How many rulers out there that you know can tell people what they say?

A bit of sniffles and men are more work than a brood of babies.

The rich take life one financial year at a time. The poor take life one meal at a time.

Suddenly, I saw ocean again—then another horizon line—but this time the deep blue sky was on the wrong side of the line…the Holy crap, we're upside down side.

When it comes to Jews, you have a two-thousand-year memory, but when it comes to us Palestinians, you have a sixty-year amnesia.

Why are we learning about the past, when this is History?

There are 2 kinds of people in the world. Those who enjoy a nice salami and those who have no souls.

Yeah, world peace would be all right, but what about a day off in a slab of ham the size of my head.

You really don't know a person until you spend some time in their panties.

Old-age sucks, but the alternative doesn't look that great, either.

Jealousy. It's a terrible thing. Unless it's someone else's.

Maybe life does suck, Pork Chop, but it beats the hell out of the alternative.

The theory of relativity doesn't amount to a hill of beans when there's a bonfire in your shorts.