Quotes About Validation

Am I really cool? You're telling me I'm cool? Well, that's good to hear.

People who do good work often think that whatever they're working on is no good. Others see what they've done and think it's wonderful, but the creator sees nothing but flaws. This pattern is no coincidence: worry made the work good.

Selfies are about self-admiration. They provide people of all ages constant opportunities to obsess about their looks and their external presentation

I can look back at stuff I wrote in my early days and squirm at some of the mistakes I made. But we're all learning every day we never stop. I just hope people keep on liking what I do. That gives me such a kick.

We tear ourselves inside out for something the world may love, then base our worth on that.

If You can play Your stuff in a pub, then You´re a good band.

We are often called upon to defend our opinions; we need never defend our feelings

The only thing that helps me get less angry is when my husband says to me, "I know you are scared, not angry" and gives me a

However, if the therapist takes everything the person with BPD says at face value without probing further—and this is not uncommon—the therapist may inadvertently reinforce their twisted thinking, making things worse.

Narcissists do not consider the pain they inflict on others; nor do they give any credence to others' perceptions. They simply do not care about thoughts and feelings that conflict with their own. Do not expect them to listen to, validate, understand, or support you. —Les Parker, PhD

Pay attention to the person's words, body language, expressions, and tone of voice. This will help you validate the person's feelings. People with BPD are not always in touch with their own emotions, and by listening closely you may be able to hear beyond the words and detect the feelings that lie beneath the surface. In

Your feelings need to be validated just as much as those of the person with BPD.

But who are you? As the child of a parent with BPD and/or other emotional and cognitive difficulties, it may be surprisingly difficult to answer this question. You likely didn't have much mirroring, or validation, when you were young, which babies need in order to know where they stand in the world, that their feelings and observations and perceptions are healthy and normal. Without that early mirroring, it was difficult to see yourself, to know yourself…

Elan Golomb (1992) says: To grow up as a whole person, children in their formative stages need the experience of genuine acceptance; they have to know they are truly seen and yet are perfect in their parent's eyes; they need to stumble and sometimes fall, only to be greeted by a parent's commiserating smile. Through parental acceptance, children learn that their "is-ness," their essential selves, merit love.

Low self-esteem. People with low self-esteem often try to relieve their shame by being good. "Goodness" comes from sacrificing themselves and what they want out of life to make up for their perceived inadequacies. The

Remember, to someone with BPD, making a mistake means being a mistake.)

No self-acceptance is possible if one is not accepted in a person-to-person relation.

What others think of us would be of little moment did it not, when known, so deeply tinge what we think of ourselves.

All women like a little flattery from time to time." "What if they didn't? What if they simply liked themselves and no one needed to bend backwards to flatter them? Wouldn't it all be simpler then?" "We're only talking about compliments, Denys," Berkeley said. "Don't be so dramatic.

When my exam results arrived several weeks later, I took the simple envelope off where I could be alone with it, my heart gunning, and broke the seal. Inside, instead of a dreadful notice telling me I'd failed, there was an official document, typed and signed. MRS. B. PURVES had been granted an English trainer's licence, good until 1925.

I wanted my parents to be proud of me and to take me seriously. I also wanted to be well past caring, complete and needing only my own validation.

Only after a person embraces her unconditional worth and value can she truly receive love from someone else.

We wouldn't worry nearly as much about what others thought of us if we recognize how seldom they do.

I've learned to stay away from publicity addicts, people who want to be famous for no reason.