Quotes About Comparison

Believe it or not, there are twice as many eyebrows in the world as there are people.

I'm one of the more pessimistic cats on the planet. I make Van Gogh look like a rodeo clown.

As it stands right now, I lead Richard Pryor in heart attacks, two to one. However, Richard still leads me, one to nothing, in burning yourself up.

A hair in the head is worth two in the brush.

If you had a million Shakespeares, could they write like a monkey?

Fly-fishing may be a very pleasant amusement; but angling or float fishing I can only compare to a stick and a string, with a worm at one end and a fool at the other.

Some folks rail against other folks, because other folks have what some folks would be glad of.

Humor, a good sense of it, is to Americans what manhood is to Spaniards and we will go to great lengths to prove it.

What a dog I got, he found out we look alike, so he killed himself.

Monkeys are superior to men in this: when a monkey looks into a mirror, he sees a monkey.

Why are there no "during" pictures?

Everywhere outside New York City is Bridgeport, Connecticut.

Don't call me a dinosaur. It isn't fair to the dinosaurs. What did a dinosaur ever do to you?

Men are not nearly as evolved as women are, nor as intelligent, evidently

Because of acid, I now know that butter is way better than margarine.

Remember when we was young, everybody used to have these arguments about who's better, Michael Jackson or Prince? Prince won!

The waiters in France could all be senators in the US.

Now I'm not an expert at mathematics, but I calculated it would take at least three of me to take on one third of one of them, even if they were attacking me with just their arse.

On the mound is Randy Jones, the left-hander with the Karl Marx hairdo.

You're looking good today Bret. Very hot... hotter than Jemaine. You have a refined bone structure, while Jemaine's facial features are too deep set to be classically handsome.

On the Rolling Stones - You will walk out of the Amphitheatre after watching the Stones perform and suddenly the Chicago stockyards smell clean and good by comparison.

Have you noticed how Emilio Estevez and Charlie Sheen look nothing alike, and yet they both manage to look exactly like their father, Martin?

All hen are created equal but some have more feather than others.

If you're going to be a narcissistic schmuck, kid, don't bother studying Faulkner. Go straight to Brett Easton Ellis. He's the role model you need.