Quotes About Perception

We didn't underestimate them. They were just a lot better than we thought.

Mansell can see him in his earphone.

The dog is very smart. He feels sorry for me because I receive so much mail; that's why he tries to bite the mailman.

If you take a bunch of superstars and put them in a room where they don't have their assistants and entourage, it's funny to see what happens.

Cause see they call me a menace; and if the shoe fits I'll wear it.

An expert is a man who tells you a simple thing in a confused way in such a fashion as to make you think the confusion is your own fault.

Whenever you observe an animal closely, you feel as if a human being sitting inside were making fun of you.

If you don't like my opinion of you, you can always improve

One out of four people in this country is mentally unbalanced. Think of your three closest friends; if they seem OK, then you're the one.

Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer.

I don't kill flies but I like to mess with their minds. I hold them above globes. They freak out and yell, 'Whoa, I'm way too high!'

I think I throw the ball as hard as anyone. The ball just doesn't get there as fast.

Remember when you're young and you think your dad is Superman? And then you grow up and realized he's just a drunk who wears a cape.

He is so shaggy. People are amazed when he gets up and they suddenly realize they have been talking to the wrong end.

I lent a friend of mine $10,000 for plastic surgery and now I don't know what he looks like.

Everything is funny, if you can laugh at it.

People think [baseball players] make $3 million and $4 million a year. They don't realize that most of us only make $500,000.

Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

The reason I drink is because when I'm sober I think I'm Eddie Fisher.

I just hate stupid people. They should have to wear signs that say 'I'm Stupid.' That way you wouldn't rely on them, and you wouldn't ask them for nothing.

If you've never seen an elephant ski, then you've never been on acid.

Some people are amazed at my brain, but really it's nothing.

Only dull people are brilliant at breakfast.

One time a cop pulled me over for running a stop sign. He said, "Didn't you see the stop sign?" I said, "Yeah, but I don't believe everything I read"