Quotes About Awkward

There's nothing worse than working out and having a guy walk back and forth looking at you, because you know he wants to talk to you, but he's calculating his tactic! Then, somehow, he comes closer and introduces himself while you're halfway through the workout - and super sweaty, with messy hair, bad makeup and out of breath!

I'm very bad at ending sentences. A lot times I just want to say, 'That's the end of my sentence. I have nothing more to say.'

'Reno 911: Miami!' is a terrible, terrible title, and all the reviews - good and mostly bad - nobody pointed out how stupid a title that was. But you can hardly come up with a sentence that's more awkward.

I've had a few embarrassing moments in restaurants. I tried to order a quesadilla, and I totally mispronounced the word. And another time, I asked for some toast with Marmite, and they had no idea what I was asking for!

I'll never have a house party again. You stand around for ages worried that nobody's coming and the next minute you're queuing for your own toilet while someone you've never met is asking you if you know whose party this is.

The hardest thing is when you're in public, and you need to go to the toilet, and someone asks for a photo. And their phone is either flat, dead, or they've turned it off completely. You're trying to rush to the toilet, and they want your autograph - and I hate saying no, I feel so bad.

There's nothing quite like exiting a toilet cubicle and seeing a girl running towards you with her hand over her mouth.

I'm a serious-minded and intense little devil, terribly gauche and so tense I don't see how people stay in the same room with me. I know I wouldn't tolerate myself.

Is there somebody out there? Amy, is that you?" her mother called. "No. Tell me this isn't happening." Quinn rested his forehead against hers. "Has she got a wiretap on you or something? I swear, she's like a walking hard-on detector." Amy bit her lip, trying not to laugh. Quinn levered himself up on his arms. "Mrs. P., if you value your life, you'll go back inside and turn off the light right now.

Suddenly he caught his reflection in the mirror behind her. His face was twisted into a dark scowl, and he was standing there naked, with a boner, and another man's business card in his hand. He looked like a dick.

She shifted closer to him and felt something hard dig into her hip. "Is that your phone?" "No, it's my giant penis and the reason you married me.

my awkward silence default setting kicked in.

You were talking to her before, right?" "Yeah. It was going well. Now it's all strange." "Have you considered extreme, desperate measures like talking to her again?

Two men are in a public bathroom, in adjoining stalls. One man calls over to the other, "Hey, there's no toilet paper in this stall, do you have any over there?" The second man replies, "No, sorry, I don't have any, either." The first man asks, "Well, do you have a newspaper?" The second man says, "No, sorry." The first man pauses then asks, "Do you have change for a twenty?

Q: What did the nurse say when she found a rectal thermometer in her pocket? A: "Some asshole has my pen.

A girl was riding the elevator down to the lobby. The elevator stopped on the tenth floor and a totally cute boy walked in. She farted. Thinking fast on her feet she said, "Cool ringtone, isn't it? Want me to send it to you?

I didn't lose my virginity until I was 18 The first time was a nightmare. Who shows you how to use a condom?

Instruments fascinate me because they're completely awkward. When I picked up a guitar for the first time I was like, "What is this?" because it's so foreign and unknown.

I might have been able to make it as a pitcher except for one thing: I had a rather awkward motion and every time I brought my left arm forward I hit myself in the ear.

At Christmas time I sat on Santa's lap. His fly was open ! Boy what a present he gave me !

Every time i try and wink at someone, I mess it up and end up scaring people.

My kids can't watch ('Howard the Duck'). By the time I get in bed with the duck, they are, like, 'Turn it off, mom. You in bed with a duck is just pretty much a deal breaker.'

It's always awkward when someone doesn't realize you're joking and devotes thought time to what you've said. Double that when the person is wearing tinfoil.

she was as welcome as a corpse is to a coroner.