Quotes from Daniel Handler

She was all the world's money, and I would spend it with her, my sharpest friend who changed the tide, my only comfort from the brutal gamble of the world and the wicked ways of men.

I wasn't just a fuck to them, any of them probably, is what I'm seeing. For every girl I thought I was uncomplicated sex, it wasn't. Put it this way: if you can't see the complication, you're probably it.

Rain, the grade school teachers say, makes the trees and flowers grow, but we're not trees and flowers, and so many grade school teachers are single.

I'd ruin any day, all my days, for those long nights with you, and I did. But that's why right there it was doomed. We couldn't only have the magic nights buzzing though the wires. We had to have the days, too, the bright impatient days spoiling everything with their unavoidable schedules, their mandatory times that don't overlap, their loyal friends who don't get along, the unforgiven travesties torn from the wall no matter what promises are uttered past midnight, and that's why we broke up.

Forever and ever, world without end.

No soy una enamorada, soy una tonta

The bus driver gave me a why-the-hell-aren't-you-at-school look and I gave him a shut-up-you're-a-bus-driver-so-bus-drive look right back.

I think one of the reasons it ended was that his eyes never lit up for me the way they did for classical music. I realize that in the long run I may not be as wonderful as a Brahms symphony but I think I'm good for a Haydn quintet.

There is only laughing across the land as the car moves you along, on your way someplace with love in the car.

Descubrí el reverso de la servilleta demasiado tarde, no cuando llegué a casa, ni cuando la guardé en la caja, sino cuando tenía el corazón destrozado y lloroso, cuando ya no era cierto.

And I almost said I love you. Instead I said nothing and you said nothing.

I never told you that, even after telling you I love you, all those times all that day, I never told you how beautiful it was then, like everyone was telling us not to be.

Finders keepers is what they say, and I wanted to be kept.

This is love, to sit with someone you've known forever in a place you've been meaning to go, and watching as their life happens to them until you stand up and it's time to go. You don't care about yours. Why should it change, the love you feel, no matter how death goes?

You know, despite all my world-weariness and cynicism, I think I've always believed that there is one person in the universe for whom you are truly meant - and the fact that sometimes there are two or even more people on the earth you can fall in love with really bothers me. It suggests that if you work hard you can be meant for anyone.

Phil Needle supposed what he meant was that he wanted to be God, just long enough to find his daughter. It was not a prayer but a promotion. This was why nobody liked God: they wanted his job.

It's okay to like jerks. I mean, it'd be better to like a nice guy, but there aren't any.

Lo que sucede con los deseos del corazón es que tu corazón ni siquiera sabe lo que desea hasta que lo tiene delante.

Te ofrecí una aventura, Ed, justo delante de ti, pero tu no fuiste capaz de verla hasta que yo te la mostré, y por eso rompimos

because damn it Ed, that's not why we broke up. I love it, I miss it, I hate to give it back to you, this complicated thing, it's why we stayed together.

Treat reluctance like seasickness, Errol said, picking something off his sleeve. If you feel it, focus on the horizon.

You think everything's sexual tension, I said to Lauren, just because you were raised my Mr. & Mrs. Super-Christian. We Jews know that underlying tensions are always due to low blood sugar. Yeah, well, you killed my Savior, Lauren said, and Jorda saluted good-bye. Don't let it happen again.

I'm writing it in this letter, the whole truth of why it happened. And the truth is that I goddamn loved you so much.

We thought we had time.