Quotes from Steve Martin

just remember, darling, it is pain that changes our lives.

When someone less capable is ahead of me, I am not pleased. It makes me insane.

She was feeling her bohemian oats.

How many people have never raised their hand before?

For a while, Mirabelle believes there will be a moment when he will cave in and let himself love her, but eventually she lets the idea go. She hits bottom. She dwells in the muck for several months, not depressed exactly, but involved in a mourning that at first she thinks is for Ray but soon realizes is for the loss of her old self.

My most persistent memory of stand - up is of my mouth being in the present and my mind being in the future: the mouth speaking the line, the body delivering the gesture, while the mind looks back, observing, analyzing, judging, worrying, and then deciding when and what to say next. Enjoyment while performing was rare - enjoyment would have been an indulgent loss of focus that comedy cannot afford.

He gave her his phone number, in a peculiar reversal of dating procedure. She might have considered kissing him, even after the horrible first date, but he just didn't seem to know what to do. However, Jeremy does have one outstanding quality. He likes her. And this quality in a person makes them infinitely interesting to the person who is being liked.

when the person beside you is making you alert and keen and the idea of being with anyone else is not imaginable…

Mirabelle is attractive; it's just that she is never the first or second girl chosen.

I just believe that the interesting time in a career is pre-success, what shaped things, how did you get to this point?

So, I can hurt now, or hurt later.

I opened the show with this line: I have decided to give the greatest performance of my life! Oh, wait, sorry, that's tomorrow night.

I just gave my cat a bath. Now how do I get all this fur off my tounge?

Lord loves a workin' man; don't trust whitey

Anyway, seeking work is a tad difficult given the poor design of the streets with their prohibitive curbs and driveways that don't quite line up.

A kiss may not be the truth but it is what we wish were true." L.A. Story (1991) – Harris Telemacher (Steve Martin)

Unlike Ray Porter, his love is fearless and without reservation.

His view of the world is one that keeps his blood pressure low, sweeping the cholesterol from his relaxed, freeway-sized arteries. Everyone knows he is going to live till age ninety, although the question that goes begging is, "for what?

I did stand-up comedy for 18 years. Ten of those years were spent learning, four years were spent refining, and four years were spent in wild success. I was seeking comic originality, and fame fell on me as a byproduct. The course was more plodding than heroic.

Thankfully, perseverance is a great substitute for talent.

It was easy to be great. Every entertainer has a night when everything is clicking. These nights are accidental and statistical: Like lucky cards in poker, you can count on them occurring over time. What was hard was to be good, consistently good, night after night, no matter what the abominable circumstances.

If you saw her in these moments, you might think she was collecting her thoughts in order to go forward. But I see it another way: Her mind is being overwhelmed by two processes that must simultaneously proceed at full steam. One is to deal with and live in the present world. The other is to re-experience and mourn something that happened long ago. It is as though her lightness pulls her toward heaven, but the extra gravity around her keeps her earthbound.

In my opening seconds, I would say, It's great to be here, then move to several other spots on the stage and say, No, it's great to be here! I would move again: No, it's great to be here!

The emotions of men, however, were of a different order. They were pesky annoyances, small dust devils at her feet. Her knack for causing heartbreak was innate, but her vitality often made people forgive her romantic misdeeds.