Quotes from Judith Martin

What is Thanksgiving without a nutty relative?

What we have come to, through a combination of popular psychology and expanding technology, is a presumption that all our thoughts and feelings are worth uttering.

There are always proper responses, even to rude questions.

Try not to annoy your relatives unnecessarily.

Sometimes we do things a certain way just because that is the way we do things.

The most conventional statements are both true and welcome.

Appearing to pay attention when someone is speaking is one of the cornerstones of real social interaction.

If written directions alone would suffice, libraries wouldn't need to have the rest of the universities attached.

Question- Should I loan a small amount of money to a friend? Answer- If you are sure that you can, if necessary, spare both.

Nowadays people consider it a disgrace to admit that they are not stressed.

Being listened to should be sufficiently gratifying in itself, whether or not the advice is followed.

When people start hurling insults at you, you know their minds are closed and there's no point in debating. You disengage yourself as quickly as possible from the situation.

Most people who work at home find they do not have the benefit of receptionists who serve as personal guards

Indeed, Miss Manners has come to believe that the basic political division in this country is not between liberals and conservatives but between those who believe that they should have a say in the love lives of strangers and those who do not.

'Honesty' in social life is often used as a cover for rudeness. But there is quite a difference between being candid in what you're talking about, and people voicing their insulting opinions under the name of honesty.

The mistake people keep making is that if they find a wonderful new tool, like email, they have to give up all others. They don't. You have simply added another very useful means to your communications repertoire.

Everybody's an art critic.

Etiquette does not render you defenseless. If it did, even I wouldn't subscribe to it. But rudeness in retaliation for rudeness just doubles the amount of rudeness in the world.

I try to behave myself, and I succeed.

Meanwhile, the empty forms of social behavior survive inappropriately in business situations. We all know that when a business sends its customers 'friendly reminders,' it really means business.

The simple idea that everyone needs a reasonable amount of challenging work in his or her life and also a personal life complete with noncompetitive leisure has never really taken hold.

It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help.

Hypocrisy is not generally a social sin, but a virtue.

Parents should conduct their arguments in quiet, respectful tones, but in a foreign language. You'd be surprised what an inducement that is to the education of children.