Quotes from Dorothy Parker

I think there is nothing like a rubber-capped thumb and a bandaged knee to render a woman practically irresistible.

Anyway, maybe it's only somebody that just died and left you twenty million dollars. Maybe it isn't some other woman at all.

I just lost all my strength of purpose - maybe the maid will find it on the floor in the morning.

People ought to be one of two things, young or old. No ; what's the good of fooling? People ought to be one of two things, young or dead.

To keep something, you must take care of it. More, you must understand just what sort of care it requires. You must know the rules and abide by them.

But in the meantime it makes you sick to think of it. That these people who pulled themselves up from centuries of oppression and exploitation cannot go on to decent living, to peace and progress and civilization, without the murder of their children, and the blocking of their way because two men—two men—want more power. It is incredible, it is fantastic, it is absolutely beyond all belief... except that it is true.

Ce qu'une femme a fait, une femme peut le refaire. Et continue a imaginer ce qui est devant toi : amis, travail, echanges interessants, rires. Et pourquoi pas une serie d'aventures empreintes d'une certaine noblesse ? il n'est pas impossible qu'on te demande d'entrer dans la danse.

Lekiem na nud? jest ciekawo??. Na ciekawo?? nie ma leku.

La cura para el aburrimiento es la curiosidad. Para la curiosidad no existe cura.

Men don't like nobility in woman. Not any men. I suppose it is because the men like to have the copyrights on nobility -- if there is going to be anything like that in a relationship.

My first love was Cinderella, but she ran off with another man.

Despite his persecutions, Mr. [Upton] Sinclair reveals himself in Money Writes! to be an enviable man. Always the thing he desires to believe is the thing he feels he knows to be true.

People Who Do Things exceed my endurance; God, for a man that solicits insurance!

If you want to know what God thinks about money, just look at the people He gives it to.

Hollywood money isn't money. It's congealed snow, melts in your hand, and there you are.

Money cannot buy health, but I'd settle for a diamond-studdedwheelchair.

The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.

As I was saying to the landlord only this morning: 'You can't have everything'.

Telegram to a friend who had just become a mother after a prolonged pregnancy: Good work, Mary. We all knew you had it in you.

The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires.

Somewhere, there, is an analogy, in a small way, if you have the patience for it. But I guess it isn't a very good anecdote. I'm better at animal stories.

It's not the tragedies that kill us; it's the messes.

It costs me never a stab nor squirm / To tread by chance upon a worm. / Aha, my little dear, / I say, Your clan will pay me back one day.

A liberal is a man who leaves the room before the fight starts.