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Quotes from P. G. Wodehouse

He was accompanied by something having the outward aspect of a dog. Blandings Castle
~ P. G. Wodehouse
Work, the what's-its-name of the thingummy and the thing-um-a-bob of the what d'you-call-it.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
It is not the being paid money in advance that jars the sensitive artist: it is the having to work.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is best not to stir them.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
Confidence, of course is an admirable asset to a golfer, but it should be an unspoken confidence. It is perilous to put it into speech. The gods of golf lie in wait to chasten the presumptious.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
Routine is the death to heroism.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
We Woosters freeze like the dickens when we seek sympathy and meet with cold reserve. "Nothing further Jeeves", I said with quiet dignity.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
They were real golfers, for real golf is a thing of the spirit, not of mere mechanical excellence of stroke.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
It was my Uncle George who discovered that alcohol was a food well in advance of modern medical thought.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is wiser not to stir them.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
Skiing consists of wearing $3,000 worth of clothes and equipment and driving 200 miles in the snow in order to stand around at a bar and drink.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
Golf, like measles, should be caught young.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
No good can come of association with anything labelled Gwladys or Ysobel or Ethyl or Mabelle or Kathryn. But particularly Gwladys.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
"Sir Jasper Finch-Farrowmere?" said Wilfred."ffinch-ffarrowmere," corrected the visitor, his sensitive ear detecting the capital letters.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
Cats as a class, have never completely got over the snootiness caused by that fact that in Ancient Egypt they were worshipped as gods.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
And she's got brains enough for two, which is the exact quantity the girl who marries you will need.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say "when."
~ P. G. Wodehouse
Memories are like mulligatawny soup in a cheap restaurant. It is best not to stir them.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
A melancholy-looking man, he had the appearance of one who has searched for the leak in life's gas-pipe with a lighted candle.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
So always look for the silver liningAnd try to find the sunny side of life.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
I'm not absolutely certain of the facts, but I rather fancy it's Shakespeare who says that it's always just when a fellow is feeling particularly braced with things in general that Fate sneaks up behind him with the bit of lead piping.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of a gun.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
Freddie experienced the sort of abysmal soul-sadness which afflicts one of Tolstoy's Russian peasants when, after putting in a heavy day's work strangling his father, beating his wife, and dropping the baby into the city's reservoir, he turns to the cupboards, only to find the vodka bottle empty.
~ P. G. Wodehouse
Sudden success in golf is like the sudden acquisition of wealth. It is apt to unsettle and deteriorate the character.
~ P. G. Wodehouse