Quotes from Charles M. Schulz

I never seem to know what's going on... Right from the very start, my life has been strange. I think I know what happened... I must have missed all the rehearsals.

Sometimes I lie awake ay night, and I wonder, "is life like golf or is it more like baseball?" Then a voice comes to me out of the dark that says, "try shuffleboard.

Though her husband often went on business trips, she hated to be left alone. "I've solved your problem," he said. "I've bought you a St. Bernard. Its name is Great Reluctance. Now, when I go away, you shall know that I am leaving you with Great Reluctance!" She hit him with a waffle iron.

Sometimes I lie awake at night thinking about all the dumb things I do every day... If I live to be eighty and I do ten dumb things each day... That would be about two hundred and ninety thousand dumb things... When you add up all the dumb things you do, it's best to use round figures...

Just wait and see, Charlie Brown. I'll see the Great Pumpkin. I'll SEE the Great Pumpkin! Just you wait, Charlie Brown. The Great Pumpkin will appear and I'll be waiting for him...

I just don't know how to write a love letter. What can you say to a girl that shows you really like her?" "How about, enclosed please find a cookie?

Sucking your thumb without a blanket is like eating a cone without ice cream!

Charlie Brown got hit with a line-drive!" "Does anyone here know anything about first-aid?" "It's probably not serious... Second or third-aid will do.

How can I play baseball when I'm worried about foreign policy?

Each year, the Great Pumpkin rises out of the pumpkin patch that he thinks is the most sincere. He's gotta pick this one. He's got to. I don't see how a pumpkin patch can be more sincere than this one. You can look around and there's not a sign of hypocrisy. Nothing but sincerity as far as the eye can see.

Do you have your own room, Charlie Brown?" "Oh, yes... I have a very nice room." "I hope you realize that you won't always have your own room... Someday you'll get drafted or something, and you'll have to leave your room forever!" "Why do you tell me things like that?" "It's on a list I've made up for you... I call it, Things You Might As Well Know!

If life were a camera, I'd have the lens cap on.

When you die, are you ever allowed to come back?" "Only if you had your hand stamped...

The hand that controls the supper dish rules the world!

Bob Dylan will be thirty years old this month..." "That's the most depressing thing I've ever heard.

Travel tips: How to avoid carsickness, seasickness and airsickness... Be careful what you eat. And stay home.

One of Beethoven's favorite dishes was macaroni and cheese. The girl I marry must be able to make good macaroni and cheese..." "How did Beethoven feel about cold cereal?

May I ask a question, Lucy?" "Go right ahead!" "Just why do you want to draw this line all the way around the world?" "Well, you know the old saying, Charlie Brown... You have to draw the line someplace!

The rain washed away my pitcher's mound... I'm a pitcher without a mound... I'm a lost soul... I'm like a politician out of office." "Or a sailor without an ocean..." "Or a boy without a girl...

What's that?" "It looks like something from Linus... It is! He sent me a little birch-bark canoe from camp! He said he made it himself... Sometimes I think I don't deserve a nice brother like Linus..." "I have often thought the same thing." "Dear Linus, please send me another canoe. The first one broke when I threw it at Charlie Brown.

Today is my grandfather's birthday." "How old is he?" "Sixty-three. It's hard to believe he was once a human being.

I guess babysitters are like used cars... You never really know what you're getting...

I've tried to be a better person... I've tried, and tried and tried! You know how hard I've tried! Tell me how I've tried..." "Nice try... Five cents, please!

See the valentine I made for Linus? On the inside, I wrote, To my sweet babboo." "He says he's not your sweet babboo." "What does he know?