Quotes from Daniel J. Siegel

the left brain is logical, linguistic, and literal, the right brain is emotional, nonverbal, experiential, and autobiographical

Un niño puede tener un apego evitativo en su relación con un progenitor y, aun así, disfrutar de un apego seguro, junto con los beneficios correspondientes, con otro cuidador.

A parent who recognizes an upstairs tantrum is left with one clear response: never negotiate with a terrorist. An upstairs tantrum calls for firm boundaries and a clear discussion about appropriate and inappropriate behavior.

Logic, responsibilities, and time don't exist for them yet. But when a toddler begins asking "Why?" all the time, you know that the left brain is beginning to really kick in.

Too often we forget that "discipline" really means "to teach"—not "to punish.

Aborda el mundo desde lo que hemos llamado un cerebro afirmativo, interactuando con nuevas oportunidades y retos desde una postura abierta, curiosa y receptiva, en lugar de rígida, temerosa y reactiva.

Ready to hear me, ready to learn, ready to understand?

You can't spoil your children by giving them too much of yourself.

Mindsight and The Developing Mind,

Recuerda: la clave está en reparar, reparar, reparar. No existe la paternidad perfecta.

In your effort to impose your own vision and desires on the world around you, you find that you won't, or possibly even can't, compromise or negotiate in any meaningful way.

La «cantidad de tiempo» sí importa. Claro que sí. Pero ver a un niño va más allá de la mera presencia física. Conlleva estar en sintonía con lo que sucede dentro de ellos y centrar realmente la atención en sus sentimientos, pensamientos y recuerdos íntimos, lo que sea que pase por sus mentes, que subyazga a su comportamiento.

Se compone de tres facetas: comprensión, empatía e integración. Como explicaremos en capítulos posteriores, se trata de entender tu propia mente; de tener capacidad de autoconciencia y autorregulación.

How we respond to our children when we're not happy with their choices—with loving guidance? with irritation and criticism? with fury and a shaming outburst?—will impact the development of our relationship with them, and even their own sense of self.

The immature brain of the child is so sensitive to social experience that adoptive parents should in fact also be called the biological parents because the family experiences they create shape the biological structure of their child's brain. Being a birth parent is only one way parents biologically shape their children's lives.

John O'Donohue, captured the essence of this emergent flow when he said that he'd love to live like a river, carried by the surprise of his own unfolding.

The right side of our brain processes our emotions and autobiographical memories, but our left side is what makes sense of these feelings and recollections. Healing from

It can be helpful to make a homemade book with pictures or photos to retell an upsetting story, or to prepare your child for a transition, like a new bedtime routine or starting preschool.

The problem with an implicit memory, especially of a painful or negative experience, is that when we aren't aware of it, it becomes a buried land mine that can limit us in significant and sometimes debilitating ways.

tuning in to her emotions. That attunement helped her "feel felt

You don't want to send the message that you'll be in relationship with her when she's "good," or "happy," but withhold your love and affection when she's not. Would you want to stay in that kind of a relationship? Wouldn't we advise our teenagers to avoid friends or partners who treat them like that when they've made a mistake?

Tenemos que dejar que aprendan que en la vida hay dolor, pero esa lección debe ir acompañada de la profunda conciencia de que nunca tendrán que sufrir solos.

works with the right to tell our life stories. When children learn to pay attention to and share their own stories, they can respond in healthy ways to everything from a scraped elbow to a major loss or trauma.

We can likely grow those soothing fibers that extend from the prefrontal upstairs brain into the downstairs brain.