Quotes from Lemony Snicket

La gente malvagia non ha mai tempo per leggere.

Other than a sign I saw once that said, 'Beware' in letters made of dead monkeys, the 'Lucky Smells Lumbermill' sign was the most disgusting sign on earth.

As I'm sure you know, whenever there is a mirror around, it is almost impossible not to take a look at yourself. Even though we all know what we look like, we all like just to look at our reflections, if only to see how we're doing.

So you're a real person! I always thought you were a legendary figure, like unicorns or Giuseppe Verdi.

For Beatrice- No one could extinguish my love, or your house.

Violet stayed still as a statue. She hadn't been listening to the last speech of Count Olaf's, knowing it would be full of the usual self-congratulatory nonsense and despicable insults.

The world, no matter how monstrously it may be threatened, has never been known to succumb entirely.

It is true there are more important things than dinner, but it is difficult to keep those things in mind when you haven't had dinner.

Tra la la, Fiddle dee dee, Hope you get well soon. Ho ho ho, hee hee hee, Have a heart-shaped balloon.

Like most fourteen-year-olds, she was right-handed, so the rocks skipped farther across the murky water when Violet used her right hand then when she used her left.

Being only twelve, Klaus of course had not read all the books in the Baudelaire library, but he had read a great many of them and had retained a lot of the information from his readings. He knew how to tell an alligator from a crocodile. He knew who killed Julius Caesar. And he knew much about the tiny, slimy animals found at Briny Beach, which he was examining now.

I love a library. Just to walk inside one, and to breathe in a room where so much literature has been gathered, is such a powerful feeling that it often brings a tear to my eye, although that could also be my mild allergy to dust.

Don't be a smart aleck," Hungry said. "But it cheers me up," I said.

I purchased some clothes for you," Theodora said..."I was given you measurements, so hopefully they fit. If they don't, you will have to either lose or gain weight or height.

The sky was dark blue twilight, pretty to look at but lonely to walk under.

They are stupid, aren't they?" Dr. Orwell agreed, as though they were talking about the weather instead of insulting young children.

I can compare sadness to a car because both are quite capable of running me over.

In front of the cave there was a sign saying it was for sale, and the orphans could not imagine who would want to buy such a phantasmagorical - the word 'phantasmagorical' here mean 'all the creepy, scary words you can think of putting together' - place.

The Incredibly Deadly Viper is one of the least dangerous and most friendly creatures in the animal kingdom. Sunny has nothing to worry about, and neither do you.

It doesn't matter if you never see someone again, I told myself. There are millions of people in the world, and most of them never see each other in the first place.

There have been only five burglars in the history of robbery who have specialized in rope. All five of these burglars were caught and sent to prison, which is why scarcely any people lock up their rope for safekeeping.

Memento Mori' means 'Remember you will die.

The siblings wished that if Mr. Poe were really jealous of them he would attend Prufrock Preparatory School himself, and they could work at the bank.

Assumptions are dangerous things to make, and like all dangerous things to make - bombs, for instance, or strawberry shortcake - if you make even the tiniest mistake you can find yourself in terrible trouble.