Quotes About Humor

Kids today, all they talk about is big air. I say, stay on the mountain, that's where the action is. If you want big air, pull my finger.

I love Benny Hill. He one of my favourites of aaall time. Like, the way Benny did it, he was just amazing. Just seeing how he put songs together and comedy and the timing and the sketches. He was way ahead of his time.

When I'm not longer rapping, I want to open up an ice cream parlor and call myself Scoop Dogg. Snoop Dogg.

Charlie Woman... woe-man... whoooa-man. She was a thief, you got to believe, she stole my heart and my cat. Judy, Betty, Josie and those hot Pussycats... they made me horny, on Saturday morning... girls of cartoo-ins will leave me in ruins... I want to to be Betty's Barney. Jane... get me off this crazy thing... called love.

Charlie You know, Scotland has its own martial arts. Yeah, it's called F-You. It's mostly just head butting and then kicking people when they're on the ground.

Harriet What do you look for in a woman you date Charlie Well, I know everyone always says sense of humor, but I'd really have to go with breast size.

I drank what?

It's better to cum in the sink, than to sink in the cum

Nice Cock Bro

Y'all don't say jive anymore, do ya?" "No, that's some ol' Sanford and Son stuff." "You shut your mouth, boy. That Redd Foxx is a comedic genius. That skinny dude you kids think is so funny? Jerry Murphy? Freddie Murphy?" "Eddie Murphy, and he's the joint!" "Your little Eddie Murphy ain't got nothing on no Redd Foxx.

Every now and then, during the commercials Dad will say something like, 'How was school today, Sophie Dophie?' Once I said, 'We played strip poker during third period and I lost.' Dad just said, 'That's nice,' without even looking up from his meatloaf.

Poirot smoothed his mustache, as if he imagined that laughing might have shaken it out of shape.

I should like to toss Eustace on a fire! What a pity such actions are against the law. All I can say is that whoever made that particular law must never have met Eustace.

He sounded as if he might be amused by the notion if he were not so weary.

I have an unorthodox sense of humor. Charles used to complain about it. I never told him this, but I don't believe in heaven and hell. Oh, I believe in God, but not the God we hear so much about.

Hi," I return, gesturing to the fish. "Nice catch." "Yeah. I'm kind of impressed with myself. I always thought redheads were sexy." "Ha-ha. I meant the fish." "Ah. Yes.

Jacinda, Sorry, but I had to leave town for a farm thing. Try not to knock any other teachers unconscious while I'm gone. See you soon (but not soon enough), Will

Let's go. I don't want to keep you from the things you have to do . . . like plan the next crime wave with your biker gang." "Sure. And you don't want to miss your nail appointment." I cocked my head. "That's tomorrow.

Some guys step on a rake in the dark, and get mad and go punch somebody. Others step on a rake in the dark and fall down laughing at themselves. I know which kind of guy I'd rather be. So do my friends.

Your diet must be about fifty-fifty, carrots and locoweed," Annie said softly. He froze. "I can't figure out what in the name of God's labia majora you think you're doing...but I'm impressed by how well you're doing it in the dark. You must have eyes like a cat.

it's better than a stick in the eye

Mensch tracht, Gott lacht. (Man plans, God laughs.) —Yiddish proverb

I have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the fridge.

And God said, 'Let there be light' and there was light, but the Electricity Board said He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.