Quotes About Humor

I love doing comedy. Absolutely love it. After 'Wedding Crashers,' people suddenly realized that it was something I could do.

I didn't have a big fat Greek wedding, but I have a lot of fat Greek friends.

You might be a redneck if you had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures.

I would love to DJ the royal wedding. Just so I could play Candle in the Wind non-stop.

The concept of marriage must have been thought up by an unimaginative pig.

My favorite part of going to a wedding is ruining the wedding.

Alexander Graham Bell's wife, who said to Alex on their wedding night, Your three minutes are up. Never got a dinner!

It would have been a wonderful wedding - had it not been mine.

Boros is not with the team today because he's attending his daughter's funeral. Oh, wait, it's her wedding.

I believe in tying the marriage knot, as long as it's around the woman's neck

My wife and I went back to the hotel where we spent our wedding night. Only this time, I stayed in the bathroom and cried.

She had been married so often she bought a drip-dry wedding dress.

I should have suspected my husband was lazy. On our wedding day, his mother told me: "I'm not losing a son; I'm gaining a couch."

In 1996, the players at the VSB tournament in Amsterdam sent me a card for my wedding with this dedication, 'Anand congrats on your wedding. You were a great player, now be ready to lose 50 points'.

My wife Staci made me go to a wedding last weekend...If it weren't for her, I'd be happy.

That should be the anti-speeding advert. It should be footage of Richard Hammond trying to remember his own wedding day.

Just went to a lovely Catholic wedding. I need a drink. They didn't even offer us water. Well they did, but it was Holy water.

Personally, I think knees should be kept for the eighth or ninth date, or the wedding day. As a nice surprise you know? 'oh, my darling, you have knees! I never would have thought

Oh I don't mind going to weddings, just as long as it's not my own.

How did that go?' he asked. 'Your first lengthy conversation with a girl your own age?' 'Fabulous,' said Artemis, voice dripping with sarcasm. 'We're planning a June wedding.

I actually performed at an orthodox Jewish wedding, where the men were separated from the women, but they both came together to not enjoy what I was talking about.

I love pizza. I want to marry it, but it would just be to eat her family at the wedding.

When I got married, the Sun ran the headline: 'Here comes the bride, all fat and wide.' Luckily, it was a few days after the wedding - but it was still hideous to read at a great romantic moment.

Let us not take ourselves too seriously. None of us has a monopoly on wisdom.