Quotes About Humor

He and I had an office so tiny that an inch smaller and it would have been adultery.

It women knew what we were thinking they'd never stop slapping us.

Be pretty if you can be witty if you must be agreeable if it kills you.

For a single woman preparing for company means wiping the lipstick off the milk carton.

She has such a nice sense of rumor.

If you can make a woman laugh you can do anything with her.

It was a woman who drove me to drink - and you know I never even thanked her.

Women are like elephants. They are interesting to look at but I wouldn't like to own one.

Women respond to comfort and a sense of humor. I was always able to make them laugh, so that helps a lot.

I go out and speak to women's groups all the time, and I say, 'Guys, you gotta laugh and find the humor in things. You gotta pass it on.'

I realised one day that men are emotional cripples. We can't express ourselves emotionally, we can only do it with anger and humour. Emotional stability and expression comes from women.

We need to remember what's important in life: friends, waffles, work. Or waffles, friends, work, it doesn't matter. But work is third.

Some tortures are physical And some are mental, But the one that is both Is dental.

You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.

Kyle Baker's work is really funny, but it's also got a very clear vision

Work hard, don't quit, be appreciative, be thankful, be grateful, be respectful, also to never whine ever, never complain, and, always, for crying out loud, keep a sense of humor.

He writes so well he makes me feel like putting my quill back in my goose.

I got a chance to work with Mel Brooks on two of his films: Silent Movie and High Anxiety.

As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are still alive when my husband gets home from work, then hey, I've done my job.

In real life I'm the type of girl who doesn't take herself too seriously. I'm very serious when it comes to work, but I like to make jokes and have a good laugh and make fun of myself.

After a long day at work, I want someone to come home, turn on my video and think, "Oh my god, how girls get ready? This is hilarious, I love this, I'm forgetting about all my problems."

I applied for a job at Starbucks. One of the questions was, 'Why do you want to work at Starbucks?' Uh, because my life is in shambles.

My brother-in-law had to give up his last job because of illness. His boss became sick of him.

Pat Patterson works at The Brisco Brothers bodyshop Yeah, he does rear-end work!