Quotes About Humor

There was plenty of dysfunction in my family and I went to Catholic School with these psychotic nuns. I would always try to be funny to lighten the mood.

Lying to other people is fine and usually funny, but lying to yourself is tacky.

The humorous story is told gravely; the teller does his best to conceal the fact that he even dimly suspects that there is anything funny about it.

When I played Lady Day, I took Aba onstage with me as a joke. He started singing-in tune!-and the audience loved it.

"I've done your dog. It's got nine eyes down the side, I made his head all square, 15 legs. What do you think of that?" "Fido looks a bit weird."

Economists state their GNP growth projections to the nearest tenth of a percentage point to prove they have a sense of humor.

A funny thing happened on the way to the election - I got to the Senate first.

Incredible to think isn't it, that every single Scotsman, started off as a scotch egg. Old and gingery.

I wanted to be funny. And I'm always acknowledged for my pranks and jokes nowadays.

You know what you are? You're a beard with an idiot hanging off it.

When I worked with Robin Williams, now there is improv! He is just as funny as you think he is. We did at least five or six takes of every scene, improvising every scene differently. He was a riot.

I get a lot of letters - a lot of letters saying, who knew that you were funny?

I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'have you got anything for wind?' So he gave me a kite.

I have an underwater camera just in case I crash my car into a river, and at the last minute I see a photo opportunity of a fish that I have never seen.

My vanity is not dead. I laugh when I see pictures of myself as I am now-maybe so I won't cry, but just because it is really funny how much I've changed.

I'd basically have trouble with any job that doesn't require me to wear silly clothes and talk in funny voices.

The idea that you can't be attractive and funny at the same time is something that I hate.

I find it very difficult to be funny, it's much easier to do tragedy than it is to do comedy.

I'm doing a very funny show in which we talk about issues. I speak at Aids charities and things. It's great to do something fun with our days and yet we're told we're doing something important.

Allow me to put the record straight. I am forty-six and have been for some years past.

If you're sick, watch funny movies.

I never drink water; that is the stuff that rusts pipes.

I said to the waitress, "There's a fly swimming in my soup." She said: "You've got too much soup - he should only be able to paddle."

You know you're a hot mess when the only person buying you drinks all night is yourself.