Quotes About Humor

For a Catholic kid in parochial school, the only way to survive the beatings - by classmates, not the nuns - was to be the funny guy.

I changed my headlights the other day. I put in strobe lights instead! Now when I drive at night, it looks like everyone else is standing still.

I got an ant farm. Them fellas didn't grow anything. Hey, how about some celery? Plus, if I tore your legs off, you would look like snowmen.

A lot of the things I say I'm just trying to be funny... I don't really mean everything I say, because I'm not totally that airhead.

Humor was also a defense mechanism from getting picked on at school. If I could be funny maybe people wouldn't bother me.

I've always been the goofy kid. Growing up, I always enjoyed the comedic aspect of relating to women. Even on camera, it was always the funny take on it.

What did the letter O say to Q? Dude, your dikk is hanging out.

I'm gonna hump ya. Like Deputy Dog... Would hump ya.

I think the best comedic actors don't play it for comedy, they play it for reality. Then you find it funny because it's real. Playing the genre is the worst thing you can do - it's embarrassing.

Well, I used to look like this when I was young and now I still do.

Clever is the eunuch version of funny.

I believe you should place a woman on a pedestal: high enough so you can look up her dress.

The bottom half of the page had descended into a doodle of a tiny man giving the middle finger to a giant, angry eagle with razor-sharp talons. Beneath it, the caption: To Mock a Killing Bird.

And, you know, I liked writing humor. Well, I should say, I wanted to write seriously, but it kept turning funny.

I don't think of myself as funny - I don't fill up a room with my humor... I would fail miserably as a stand-up comedian.

Those who knew Lincoln described him as an extraordinarily funny man. Humor was an essential aspect of his temperament. He laughed, he explained, so he did not weep.

I'm going to memorize your name and throw my head away.

I like funny guys and those, for some reason, tend to be nerdy guys.

Robin Williams learned technique. He has the technique of being funny.

As a young girl, if you do something funny - especially if you're Jewish - someone says, 'Oh, have you seen Gilda Radner?'

Everything's funny - in the right context and done by the right person.

I was funny -- ha-ha, not peculiar. It was a modest currency, like pennies: pedestrian, somewhat laborious, but a currency nonetheless. I was funny, in public, most often at my own expense.

A lot of people can be very scared about making themselves vulnerable and appearing uncool. I don't really give a damn; as long as it's funny, I'll do it [make fun of myself].

After the Soviet Union collapsed, people thought I wasn't funny anymore.